World Cup: No, There Will Be No Live Blogging Today

The coveted third place game between Germany and Portugal kicks off in a little while and there will be no one to live blog the event. I certainly won't be able to do it. Not when Bravo's showing "The Restaurant" marathon all afternoon. But, of course, there are plenty of people blogging about the World Cup today — even if none of it's about today's game. But what do third place winners get, anyway? A parasol decorated in team colors? A basket of fruit?
Regardless, as entertaining as the WC has been so far this year, the snooze alarm is getting hit on this one. I'll switch between Rocco and ESPN to let you know if there's any streaking or interesting happening. For now, observe these soccer fanatics wit and wisdom:
• Some of the reasons why Brazil failed the World Cup — and it's not because there were too many players with single names. [ Sportsolysis]
• Inside the Actor's Studio with an Italian soccer player. Salud. [ Zembla]
• Smart people say the World Cup announcers haven't been that bad. Your Sports Center-addled minds are just too stupid to process nuance and subtlety. Or something. [ Slate
• More stuff for smart people! Gelf magazine goes indepth about the zero-sum aspect of penalty kicks [ Gelf]
• And a new goalie for Germany means that the line moves. What? You're not betting on the bronze match on the World Cup? Pathetic. [ Covers]
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