Deadspin
We haven't caught up with former NBA All-Star Glen Rice for a while. What's he up to? Playin' some golf? Sellin' some cars? Well, no. He's walking into his estranged wife's home and finding a guy hiding in the closet. Uh-oh.
All told, we suspect it could have been worse for the guy.
The 6-foot-8-inch former basketball star went to the Coral Gables home he once shared with his estranged wife and four kids and used a key to enter the front door. Once inside, he confronted his wife, Christina, and demanded to know the identity of the man who he found crouching in the master closet.
"Mr. Rice then grabbed the victim by his throat and physically removed him from the bedroom," Miami-Dade police spokesman Roy Rutland said.
The guy then ran off and called the police; he said he needed nine stitches to his forehead. It is not said whether or not Rice causes those; we prefer to think he was lanced by a stray wire hanger while he was hiding in the closet.
Former Heat Star Arrested On Battery Charge [Local10]
(UPDATE: Outstanding find from Sports By Brooks: The guy in the closet is a dance instructor who invented Zumba! Whatever that is!)
Comments
Thus explains the absence of Lt. Winslow.
Was it a Half Pint Brawler?
so the guy was kanye west?
We know it's not Tim Hardaway because he hasn't come out of the closet. Yet.
R. Kelly couldn't write a better story himself.
What are you doing in my closet, Jeffrey Beaumont?
That'll teach Martin Lawrence to hide in other people's closets.
She really stuck to him. Like white on Rice.
What is it with former NBA players and people coming out of closets?
oh my god a rubber, rubber, rubber
did he put the other guy under his leg before windmilling him out of the door?
Was there a little person with a gun involved? According to a documentary I watched on this subject, that's how it always ends.
It was Rumeal Robinson.
She just needed to surround the dude with stuffed animals and Glen would've never noticed.
Alberto Perez, huh? Najeh Davenport would have been my first guess.
Get off my high school yearbooks, that broken laptop, a shoebox full of old birthday cards, two shirts I've been looking for and an empty golf bag, MOTHERFUCKER.
@Rob Iracane:
They're hiding under the sink in the bathroom.
An NBA player who can fight? I call bullshit.
No word on whether Tom Cruise and John Travolta came out of that closet too.
Sometimes you think you have true love, and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double-team your girlfriend...
Martin Lawrence is working out! Where the white women at?
The reason they were estranged is because the relationship started of great and fiery but later on Glenn spent most of his time way outside
@Miguel Cowbrera: off! asshat
mothafuckas be hidin in closets and shit like its a game o sumthin. bout to go charlotte hornet on yo ass
It was Tyler Perry.
Also: no, yes
The guy in the closet should have put his cell phone on vibrate. That's how R. Kelly got busted.
@44 in a Row: "I'm here for the gangbang?"
Never mess with another man's rhubarb
Coral Gables? And I thought Glen Rice could only hit from downtown.
@VTBen: You haven't heard? Tom Cruise is very hetero.
Or over compensating, either way.
[www.slate.com]
Has this guy never watched TV? You are supposed to hide under the bed!
"I wasn't banging your wife! I'm just coming back from Narnia!"
"How do you feel about hooks? A series of hooks everywhere."
He was great in NBA JAM.
@Lady Andrea: +1. You put this disease in me.
I don't know what kind of "in the closet" would be worse to discover.
I DIDN'T DO IT!!!
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Sent by my Blackberry Wireless Handheld
He was married to Sarah Jessica Parker aka Dee Snider?
I don't know what the big deal is - all the guy was doing was trying to get himself some estrange.
As long as the dude didn't poop in the hamper.
Everybody Zumba!!
[www.sportsbybrooks.com]
The late great Notorious B.I.G. wrote a song about it, wanna hear it, here's how it goes:
We fucked in his bed, quite dangerous
I'm in his ass while he playin gainst the Utah Jazz
My 112, CD blast, I was past
She came twice I came last, roll the grass
She giggle, sayin i'm smokin on homegrown
Then I heard her moan, honey I'm home
Yep, tote chrome for situations like this
I'm up in his broad I know he won't like this
/lame In Living Color reference, but at leasts its better than a reference to that other guy.
@HIV 2 Elway: I should've known you'd get that. What happened to your Bob avatar?
Not to be upstaged, Antoine Walker hid in a giant turtle slide in the play area of a local mall and jumped out and ran when the first kid slid down.
@Lady Andrea: What can I say, I love me some Lynch. Bob is off somewhere in the Black Lodge, he'll be back.
@twoeightnine:
Classes offered in both "vertical" and "horizontal".
(whispering) In sum, Glen Rice's ex-wife has a lot of shoes. This is Kige Ramsey, YouTube sports.
Dr. Loomis showed up just in time and shot Glen Rice six times in the chest until he fell off the second-story balcony.
Hey Glen, these save marriages.
Those California Closets reps will do anything to make a sale.
@buwolverine: Slate.com, always trying to give us the contradicting point of view.
The guy might have been doing research for a novel within a John Irving novel.
he he he. Donald Fehr is not as agreeable on unilaterally accepting all of the recommendations from the Mitchell Report as Selig. waffle waffle waffle.
It was funnier when John Ritter did this.
It was actually Eddy Curry in the closet, who can't seem to avoid getting beat up by people shorter than he. Self-DE-FENSE!