Just when you think Lenny Dykstra has finally drowned in life's big fat puddle of chew spit, he swims to the surface long enough to cough up just a little more of what's left of his dignity.

A celebrity boxing promoter is rigging the outcome of his fights, which he didn't have a license to stage anyway. Remember, this only concerns boxing. David Arquette still won the WCW Heavyweight Championship fair and square. [AP]

King, perhaps having gained experience from his unsanctioned LAPD-rules handicap match, will be joining the celebrity boxing circuit with a bout against a former police officer. This will be handled with the utmost class, I'm sure.

Jose Canseco didn't fare so well against a real fighter. Now he'll try his luck boxing Bill "El Wingador" Simmons. That's not a nickname for the Sports Fella, it's a guy who eats for a living.[Celebrity Boxing Federation]