Remember when Albert Haynesworth signed that massive contract with the Washington Redskins, and then spent a season playing so poorly that people actually wondered if he was trying to get released? As it turns out, he was!
For nearly two decades, Sports Illustrated has stirred the tea leaves to discern a weekly Sign of the Apocalypse. Deadspin salutes the magazine's ongoing effort to cover the end of times but declines to cede the scoop on the biggest event in world history.
After learning that Fred Davis's season was over with a torn Achilles tendon, the Redskins called up Chris Cooley, fan favorite and Washington's tight end from 2004 to 2011. While negotiating a contract, Cooley had an interesting, hop-filled request that Washington unfortunately didn't fulfill.
Washington Redskins tight ends: They're just like us! Chris Cooley, down-to-earth potter, also finds strange gratification in seeing Tony Romo fail. During his weekly guest spot on the LaVar and Dukes show in Washington, Cooley fed the rivalry by sharing how he really feels about the Cowboys QB:
Local police in Leesburg, Va. are searching for the suspect that broke into Chris Cooley's art gallery on South King Street early Friday morning. Thankfully, no art or pottery was stolen in the burglary. More importantly, though, Chris Cooley owns an art gallery.
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Redskins tight end Chris Cooley.
Our old friend Chris Cooley is back. No, he's not showing us his penis this time. But after seeing this video, we almost wish he had.
One more rundown before we start talking about stuff in 2010. These are the top 10 most popular posts of the Deadspin decade (2005-2009). It's an interesting glimpse into the psyche of the internet viewer. (Low-to-high, as usual.)
"He does not like short shorts; I was directly made aware of that. But it's not like he's a jerk about it. He'll just talk to you." [Washingtonian]
Some people are fans of the Washington Redskins and Chris Cooley's wife. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Washington Redskins. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group.
The Deadspin Hall of Fame is not just for individuals: It is for themes, for common bonds, for lasting memes ... for dongs.