Bills Say Someone Shined Laser Pointer On Them; Guy Tweets He Did It

Though the Bills took down the Lions in Detroit yesterday, not all was beer and skittles. During the game, quarterback Kyle Orton and holder Colton Schmidt complained to officials that someone had shined a laser pointer in their faces. And a dude on Twitter claimed to be the one behind it. » 10/06/14 12:20pm 10/06/14 12:20pm

With Orton Or Romo, The Cowboys Are Still The Cowboys

The Cowboys' season ended in a way that all Cowboys' seasons now seem destined to end: With an 8-8 record, a trip to the playoffs handed over to a division rival, and a backbreaking interception. Tony Romo may not have been there to preside over this year's clusterfuck, but he wasn't needed—the Cowboys are always… » 12/30/13 10:00am 12/30/13 10:00am

Kyle Orton Solemnly Vows To Never Be Drunk On Camera Again

That's his promise. In his new role as the Bears starting quarterback, Orton has sworn that he's all business and that his hard-partying days of internet lore are long behind him. He's a new man — a married » 9/05/08 10:45am 9/05/08 10:45am man — who won't give his teammates a reason to question his leadership abilities this time around. He's more…

The Prodigal, Bloodshot, Neckbearded, Booze-Swilling Son Returns

In the past hour there have been no less than three emails with "The Neckbeard Returns!" as the subject line. This is either a bold move or an absolutely desperate one, but it's true: Kyle Orton is the starting quarterback for the 2008 Chicago Bears' season opener » 8/18/08 6:15pm 8/18/08 6:15pm. Orton overcame Rex Grossman in the "open…

Rex Grossman or Kyle Orton? A Coin Flip Shall Decide Chicago's…

It's only July and already Bears fans are terrified. Who's going to start at quarterback: The mediocre bearded guy or the mediocre short guy? Well, even the players themselves can't decide. So they did what any reasonable, competitive football player would do...they flipped a coin. Cue the Chicago Tribune: » 7/23/08 5:15pm 7/23/08 5:15pm