Sure, there are numerous telltale signs that the NFL season is fast approaching, but it's not until you see that first true Telestrator Dong that it all starts to really sink in.

Wrote tipster Tom B., "Phil Simms drew a cock and balls shooting a small load during the Packers game!" However, like-minded tipster Andrew H. presented it without comment. Potato. Potato.

By the looks of the screenshot sent in by tipster Greg E., the fine people of Chicago, Rockford and beyond have roughly 36 hours to prepare for what weatherman Mike Caplan says is coming their way.

This red telestrator dong was brought to you by John Bolaris of Philadelphia's Fox29. Looks to be more than 100-miles long. (H/T R.A.)

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.

Everything about this picture is ideal: facial expressions, hand gestures, and, especially, telestrator dong placement (TDP). Why, this telestrator dong was so perfect, The Daily Show got in on the fun. Video after the jump.

Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.

To Nick Kraynok, these things are good: golf, jet skiing, playing the guitar, rooting for Pittsburgh professional teams and telling the people of San Angelo, Texas the weather.

Several tipsters have dutifully sent a TV-screen shot in from the Ohio State game, maintaining it represents "Telestrator Dong," "Long Crooked Dong," and/or "Long Buckeye Dong."