Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Also a Huge Upset This Season: "The Mentalist" Not About Marbury

Illustration for article titled Also a Huge Upset This Season: "The Mentalist" Not About Marbury

Can the Celtics' loss to the Warriors really be called "one of the season's biggest upsets" on a night when the Bobcats, Timberwolves, and Grizzlies won?

Oh, and Allen Iverson had to fling up yet another patented AI contact-and-eject attempt at drawing a foul 15 feet from the basket that fell with zero point two for the Pistons to beat the Thunder 90-88. So let's all take another drag off the egg nog while it still tastes roughly like foodstuffs and not lose our collective excrement over the Celtics qualifying for a losing streak for the first time this season in a 99-89 loss. Yes, it's Golden State without Jamal and Corey, but has everyone forgotten that Stephen Jackson matriculated from Ballin' U with a 18.6 GPA? We love you, Punctuation Station, but deep breaths before captioning, k?

Miami 90, Chicago 77. The Bulls' star of the game was Aaron Gray with 12 and 11 on 5-7 shooting. 'Nuff said.


Utah 97, Dallas 88. We thought Rick Carlisle was supposed to be one of those disciplinarian-type shouters. Do you think he could keep one or two of his key players from shoving, slapping, or crotch-grabbing the opposition long enough to stay in games? Dirk Nowitzki took his early two-tech exit after punching Matt Harpring in the mouth totally accidentally no really he means it this time. Maybe Dirk lashed out pre-emptively after hearing about this "kissing men in Utah" thing.

Denver 105, Philadelphia 101. Sign #32409 Don Nelson George Karl has checked out: J.R. Smith flung 11 threes at the rim in the process of shooting 20 times and still played 35 minutes. Reason #1 you didn't see the sign: you're still blocking Ace of Base. Reason #2: J.R. rattled home 7 of those three-pointers.

Minnesota 120, New York 107. Sebastian Telfair scores 20, gets linked to Knicks in wild trade speculation.

Also receiving votes: Charlotte 95, New Jersey 87; New Orleans 88, Houston 79; Memphis 108, Indiana 105; Toronto 107, Sacramento 101.

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