America's Beautiful Wonderteen, Christian Pulisic, Just Ran Through Real Madrid

Photo credit: Martin Meissner/AP
Photo credit: Martin Meissner/AP

Borussia Dortmund, one of the world’s very best soccer teams, found themselves down against Real Madrid, the most famous sports team on the planet, in a Champions League match today. Looking to change the game, they turned to a goddamn American child, 18-year-old Christian Pulisic, to save the day. And then he did:


It’s not exactly clear if Pulisic’s cross will go down as an assist, since Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang gets close to making contact with the ball before it falls to eventual scorer André Schürrle, and it definitely looks like Madrid defender Dani Carvajal gets a shoulder on the ball along the way. But it doesn’t really matter. That this teen created the goal by bursting past Danilo on the wing and charging into Real’s penalty box without fear, luring in a couple markers before hitting the goal-making pass out to Schürrle, is incredible.

He never for a second looked like he didn’t belong on the pitch with all those world-class players. He made shit happen whenever he touched the ball. He is a superstar in the making and he is all ours.