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As you may know, your beloved, floppy-haired Midwesterner Will Leitch is gone today, gallavanting across the not-so-frozen tundra to "another goddamn wedding." And I, A.J. Daulerio, have the unenviable task of writing America's most popular sports blog on Will's first full day away from his baby. He's left me an exhaustive list of post-it notes, suggestions, diaper bags, emergency phone numbers and First Aid manuals to make sure everything goes okay. Regardless, he'll still call every ten minutes to check in. I'll probably have to hold the phone up to the computer monitor at one point during the day just so he can make sure the site is still breathing.

So, I'm a mere vessel today. This will probably be my only original post and most of my work is already done for me by either Will or his more than capable cohort Rick Chandler. My only job is not to drop the baby or leave it unattended in a shopping mall some place when I go out for lunch. But hit me up with all your tips anyway. Please. I have no RSS feeder and have gotten used to taking long afternoon naps. And let's hope for Will's sake that there is no breaking news involving lesbian NFL cheerleaders, another Marcus Vick meltdown or a surprise Clinton Portis press conference. He would, for lack of a better phrase, lose his shit.

And, no, I'm not J.J. Jack. At all.

Bring Us Your Finest Beers and Cheeses [Deadspin]