albertburneko Page 20 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How "Fake News" Became Meaningless
Let’s talk about fake news. Are you excited? I am! (Actually I’m not. That claim was fake news.)...
What's The View Like From Your Window?
It’s Friday afternoon. That’s the big window in the living room of the forest cabin that my family and I moved into a little over a week ago. It’s nice. I sit in that chair on the right side and do blogs. I’m sitting in that chair right now!...
Craven Reporters Scold BuzzFeed For Reporting News<em></em>
As you’re likely aware by now, yesterday evening BuzzFeed published a dossier of allegations about Donald Trump, including the instantly unforgettable description of a hotel-room piss party with Russian prostitutes. This set the internet on fire for much of last night and dominated a bizarre press c...
Some Quotes From Peter King's Chris Berman Retrospective, Paraphrased
“What I believe may surprise his fans and his critics is that Boomer just about outworks everybody who people would consider his competition.” - Chris Mortensen...
Jabari Parker's Shorts Game Is Extremely Strong
Get a load of this cool motherfucker:...
Some Ryan Gosling Movies That People Like Actually Are Not Good
La La Land is not good. Actually it’s bad. It’s going to win a bunch of Oscars because it has Ryan Gosling in it, and Ryan Gosling is a handsome man who is understood to choose good roles in ambitious awards-y movies, and then to not make many facial expressions in those movies, in a style of acting...
DeMarcus Cousins Is On The Sacramento Kings
DeMarcus Cousins is on the Sacramento Kings. He is not on the Boston Celtics. His time on the Boston Celtics has not gone well or poorly, because he has not had any time on the Boston Celtics, because all of his time has been on the Sacramento Kings. (Also he is not on any other teams, except for th...
How The Fuck High Was This <i>New Yorker</i> Guy When He Wrote This <i>Star Wars</i> Take?
Listen. I am not going to try to unpack and critique the bonkers Rogue One review published by the New Yorker’s Richard Brody today. I do not even know where to begin. I am just going to blockquote some portions down below this paragraph, and I invite you to join me in making halting, inarticulate, ...
What Does The U.S. Department Of Energy Do?
The Department of Energy (DOE) is a Cabinet-level department in the United States government, created in 1977. It is a descendant of—and consolidates the functions of—several predecessor agencies, among them the Energy Research and Development Administration (ERDA), which was itself a descendant of ...
Let's Share Our Petty Stories About Famous People Acting Uncool
A very long time ago, during George W. Bush’s first term as president, Dick Cheney came into the Northern Virginia bookstore where I worked. Just surly old then-Vice President Dick Cheney and maybe a handful of (identifiable, visible) Secret Service dudes, coming into the bookstore on a weekend afte...
The Wizards Are Dead, Ernie Grunfeld Has Killed Them
John Wall scored 52 points last night in a mostly empty arena against the Orlando Magic, who defeated the Wizards anyway, despite not being good or playing all that well. Below is the full highlight reel, if you’re into seeing one of the NBA’s most thrilling players deliver the best scoring performa...
An Incomplete Review Of Metallica's New Record: It Owns
Over at the Ringer, our pal Rob Harvilla has a good, funny, thorough review of the new Metallica record, Hardwired... to Self-Destruct. If you want the record placed thoughtfully in the broader context of Metallica’s career, and the 20-or-so years it has spent sorta flailing around and tripping over...
Ways To Die That Are More Awful Than Dissolving In A Scalding Acid Bath, Ranked
A tourist who fancied a bath in one of Yellowstone National Park’s many geothermal pools slipped while attempting to gauge the temperature of the broth, fell into what turned out to be a deadly near-boiling acid bath, and dissolved. That is about the most metal thing I can imagine, but also he is ex...
We Went To Rural Georgia And Smoked A Ton Of Meat
This week’s episode of Foodspin finds me and Drew in the small town of Unadilla, somewhere in what sure felt like the wilds of rural Georgia, where we visited what can only be described as the compound of famed barbecue master Myron Mixon. (Cue “Dueling Banjos.”) There we learned how to build a pit ...
AP: Donald Trump Will Be The President Of The United States Of America
Today Americans selected Donald Trump—a white-supremacist sexual predator with open contempt for the rule of law, who campaigned on promises to remove First Amendment protections from journalists, punish women who receive abortions, ban Muslims from entering the country, prosecute his opponent, depo...
Here Are Some Young NBA Players Who Are Butt
Many NBA teams have bright, bushy-tailed youths on them. Some of these youths will become cool and good professional basketball stars, but some of them, I am sorry to report, are butt. Here, in no particular order, are some young NBA players who are butt....
Wizards And Caps Owner: I Suck Because D.C. Won't Pay My Bills For Me
This motherfucker. Here’s Ted Leonsis, majority owner of the Washington Capitals, the Washington Wizards, and the arena in which both those teams play their home games, D.C.’s Verizon Center, mewling to the Washington Post because he has to pay his own mortgage and building costs instead of passing ...
The Cubs Don't Have To Pretend To Be Lovable Losers Anymore
Cubs fans: Go crazy, you’ve waited more than long enough. But while this World Series is a welcome end to your suffering, let us not pretend that the Cubs franchise has ever been half as downtrodden as it portrays itself. Losing does not automatically bestow charm; underachievement does not make an ...
Get A Load Of The Sports Dude's Extremely Poor World Series Take
Hey, look! It’s The Ringer’s Bill Simmons, definitely unknowingly walking smack-dab into what in no way looks like a prearranged and staged TMZ ambush today in Los Angeles, where reporters lurked to find out what famous Hollywood power-player Bill Simmons thinks will happen in Game 6 of the World Se...