albertburneko Page 36 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How To Make Chili, Instead Of Just Arguing About It All The Damn Time
Summer is over, pretty definitively: The mornings are cold and crisp and the leaves are beginning to change colors and the soupy yellow humidity-haze is gone from the air and there's Halloween shit on display in the grocery stores and, uh, like, also literally?—summer is actually over. It's autum...
This Church Song-And-Dance Is The Most Excruciating Thing I've Ever Seen
Oh God. Ohhhhh God. I hurt all over. I hurt all over and I want to die....
Marcin Gortat Gets A Hard-Ass Mohawk, Becomes Terrifying
All in all, Marcin Gortat is a pretty good NBA center. He's big, he's strong, he's got pretty nimble feet for his size. He sets devastating screens, he's an outstanding finisher rolling to the hoop, he's generally OK at being in the right place defensively. He also happens to be a ludicrously e...
Hey Look, It's The Sad Cocktail Grenades You Always Wanted
Evidently these have been around for a while, but they're new to me. BuzzBallz: Regret In a Can. BuzzBallz: Liquid Cold-Sore. BuzzBallz: Convex Around the Sides, Like Your Abdomen When Fluid Accumulates In Your Peritoneal Cavity as a Result of the Liver Cirrhosis You Get From Living the Kind of L...
Paula Deen Wint Awn <em>The T'Day Show</em>, Is Still Grosser 'N Shit, Yawl
Crazy-eyed butter-marm Paula Deen took to The Today Show this morning, ostensibly to talk about life lessons and learnin' from mah mistakes, yawl and other such nonsense, but really to promote her dumber-than-hell ill-conceived new subscription-based online network. ...
Paula Deen's Leftovers Are Now Available For $10 A Month
Get fuckin' pumped, America, because Paula Deen is back, and this time, it's ... uh ... a subscription-based online network where you can pay to watch old episodes of her bad TV shows, instead of watching them for free on a different website, or not watching them at all. Hardcore....
Peter King Thinks He Thinks You Think Goodell Is Doing A Good Job, Maybe
There's an NBC News/Marist poll going around—maybe you've seen it—in which 606 adults answered questions about the NFL's and Roger Goodell's handling of its various domestic violence scandals. One of the questions asks whether respondents think Roger Goodell should resign; 29 percent of them say ...
How To Make Pasta With Leeks And Prosciutto, While There's Still Time
Oh shit, dinner is still A Thing. It exists. Disaster. This is you, creeping incrementally homeward in the transportation gridlock of your locale and mode of transit, flop-sweaty and wild-eyed like John Lithgow on the airplane, doing a frantic mental inventory of the nigh-barren refrigerator wa...
McDonald's Is Poisoning iPhone-Line Denizens With Food From McDonald's
Man, Apple customers get all the free shit lately. ...
Boner Dog Is Feeling Super Conflicted About His Giant Dog Boner
Sure, in one sense, this boner dog is from back in 2013. But, in another, larger, truer sense, this boner dog is a timeless boner dog. Look at those sad eyes. It's a heavy burden, this enormous dog boner. Who will help me bear this dog boner? Can't even get any work done in my office chair....
California's Endless Drought Cruelly Menaces Innocent Sushi Prices
Well, you finally did it, humans. You finally fucked up the ecosystem enough to imperil something that matters. No, not the millions of innocent human beings whose access to potable water is threatened by what appears more and more to be the end of rain- and snowfall in California. No. The sush...
The Foodspin Archive
Here’s a complete archive of all the Saturday Foodspin columns, which we’ll update each time there’s a new one....
How To Make A Baked Egg--Yes, Goddammit, A <em>Baked</em> Egg
You say "baked egg" and people look at you like they're concerned for your wellbeing and go, "... baked egg?" And you go, "Yeah, y'know, like a shirred egg, only more Italian," and they go, "What in the damn hell is a 'shirred egg'?" And then you say, "Oh, goddammit, now I'm gonna have to write ...
Here Is The Worst Possible Photo
Pictured: NFL commissioner Roger Goodell, right, and credulous bullhorn Peter King take a break from spewing garbage to devour some....
Wall Street: Olive Garden Makes Bad Food Badly
A fight for control over Olive Garden's parent company, Darden Restaurants, has shed light on some of the Italianish restaurant chain's less-than-ideal kitchen practices. For example: Olive Garden kitchens do not salt their pasta water. For another example: Olive Garden kitchens exclusively prepar...
Huge Red Wine Counterfeiting Scheme Busted In Italy
Italian cops have foiled what the Siena police chief calls "the biggest fraud ever carried out in the agricultural and food sector": a wine expert's attempt to pass off nearly a quarter-million bottles of fake Brunello di Montalcino wine....
This Dumb Cup Has Room For Chips And Soda, But Not For Dignity
Perhaps you have seen a TV commercial for a product called "Snackeez," a grotesquely large plastic beverage cup with a special dry chamber for storing your favorite garbage snacks. If you have not, here it is:...
Yes, Bruce Levenson's Racist Email Was Racist
By now you're aware that Bruce Levenson, controlling owner of the Atlanta Hawks, is selling his stake in the team, at least in part because of fallout from an email he sent to other members of team management back in 2012, theorizing that the team struggles to fill its arena because "the black c...