barryap Page 619 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Fake Yo-Yo Trickster Fools Every TV Station Everywhere
A strange, strange man has been showing up on morning shows throughout the Midwest, claiming to be a yo-yo trick champion. He is not. He is actually terrible at yo-yo. Yet he keeps getting on the air....

Notre Dame Golfer DQ'ed For Pulling Scores Out Of Her Ass
Annie Brophy was booted from this weekend's NCAA Regional for giving herself a 30 on the front nine, even though she didn't shoot anywhere near that. Somewhere, Hootie Johnson is tenting his fingers and cackling. [Golfweek]...

Cavs' Offer To LeBron Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cleveland's chances at keeping LeBron, which, thanks to three blowout conference semifinals, are looking slightly brighter this morning....

Ted Leonsis: Greatest Owner Ever?
As his first act as owner of the Wizards (and the Verizon Center), Leonsis will take down the Washington Mystics' attendance banners. All the Mystics fans will be chartering a single Volkswagen Golf to drive to the protest. [Ted's Take]...

Barca Striker Is Not Gay, He Insists Loudly
This photo of Barcelona's Gerard Pique and Zlatan Ibrahimovic has been making the rounds, with the expected chatter. Ibra had this to say to a reporter: "Come to my house with your sister and see if I'm queer." [via Dirty Tackle]...

The Natural Disaster Telestrator Dong: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....

Dairy Council Takes The Fall For The Patriots
Remember when the Patriots ditched a nice little middle school event to, I dunno, go shoot up drugs or something? It wasn't their fault, says this New England Dairy Council press release, which was probably drafted at Belichick gunpoint....

LT's Weight Loss Spokesman Replacement Has A Little Less Star Power
Lawrence Taylor is accused of doing some Very Bad Things. That means he's not allowed to tell us how he lost 35 pounds (results not typical) on Nutrisystem. Now pinch hitting: Matt Stairs....

Welcome To Bizarro Continent, Where Canada Owns Our Asses At Sports Management
While Glendale and Gary Bettman flounder about, there's already a deal in place to move the Coyotes to Winnipeg. Meanwhile Montreal has been tapped to join MLS, and, oh look, they've already got a team. Shit, America, get it together....

Not-So-Great Memorabilia For A Great Cause
Vince Young is partnering to help raise money for Tennessee flood victims: donate $100, and receive an autographed photo. But don't worry, we checked; donate $150, and they won't send the photo. [Vincent Young Foundation]...

Derek Jeter Says: Always Use Protection, Kids
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Lawrence Taylor's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Since this morning, the age on LT's alleged prostitute has been bumped from 15 to 16, and he's no longer accused of beating her (her pimp is). Do these revelations make things better? No, they do not....

Let's Give Tebow A Nickname!
Page 2 held a write-in contest to come up with a nickname for best-selling NFL jersey owner Tim Tebow. They have standards and censorship. We do not. We think our commenters can do a little better. [ESPN]...

Look, They Made Soccer Fun!
Perhaps the Scottish Premier League isn't the best quality of play, but Motherwell's four goals in the last 25 minutes to salvage a 6-6 draw — with a Europa League spot on the line — still makes for a classic match....

Amar'e Is Against Arizona's Immigration Bill Because The Jews Have Suffered Enough (UPDATE)
Whatever your politics, there are plenty of good reasons to support "Los Suns'" Cinco De Mayo gesture. Amar'e Stoudemire's is not one of them....

This Lawrence Taylor Story Is Going To Get Real Ugly, Real Fast
Taylor is charged with beating and raping a 16-year-old girl overnight. He's currently in jail, awaiting his arraignment. A press conference is scheduled for this afternoon. [AnimalNY]...

Last Night's Winner: Eric Byrnes's New Softball Team
In sports, everyone is a winner - some people just win better than others. Like a California beer league softball team, which will have the services of the former major leaguer, without having to pick up that $11m contract....

Patriots Stand Up Middle Schoolers
A Connecticut middle school won the opportunity to work out with Patriots players. They received a visit from a team intern, and some exercise videos....

When Golf Meets Cliff Diving
A New Zealand man fell 100 feet off a cliff while looking for his golf ball yesterday. Looks like someone read that article on how valuable lost balls are. [New Zealand Herald]...

Soccer Player Gets Carded For Fatal Heart Attack (UPDATE)
Welp, diving in soccer now has its "boy who cried wolf" moment. The ref showed a collapsed Croatian player a yellow card because he thought he was faking. He wasn't. He was dead....