barryap Page 674 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today In Thinly-Veiled Omens
The oldest male jaguar at the Jacksonville Zoo has been euthanized, after suffering since August. Panthers throughout Florida and the Carolinas are sleeping poorly tonight. [Times-Union]...

George Lopez Is This Year's Frank Caliendo
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Time To Clear The Air Jordan
MJ will be a special assistant to the Americans at this weekend's Presidents Cup, but he won't have his signature cigar in hand. Why not? Liberals!...

Marshall's AD Is Surrounded By College Girls
Until he can find permanent housing, Mike Hamrick is living in an all-female dorm wing. He's living every man's dream, except the women are all half his age. So, yeah, he's living every man's dream. [The Parthenon]...

Hawkeye Goes From Fan To Fanatic To Psychotic
At first this reads like the further pussification of sports, where a fan gets arrested for heckling a player. But it quickly takes a turn into Annie Wilkes territory....

Would-Be Thugs Pick On The Wrong Crossdressers (UPDATED WITH VIDEO)
Next time you try to beat up a couple of women, make sure they're not men in drag. And also MMA fighters....

Nicaragua's About To Get Some New Tigers Gear
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

NFL Players' Softer Sides Are Just As Dumb
Disclosure: thanks to a friend in editorial, I'm often one of the anonymous guys in the "men tell you what they really want" articles at Cosmo. That's my excuse for knowing that this month's issue features some football players....

Even The Aflac Duck Has It Out For The Mets
Since we won't have them to kick around in October, let's dump this here. [Via]...

Philly Nightlife Too Much For Marlins Pitcher
Sean West is a nondescript pitcher on a nondescript Florida Marlins team. But his night on the town in Philadelphia this weekend? Well, it defies description....

Lamar Odom's Biological Clock Must Be Ticking
We knew Lamar Odom was impetuous, but just how impetuous? Try proposing marriage to this woman (and getting rejected) just a week before hooking up with Khloe Kardashian....

Boston Has The Breast Fans In Hockey
How do you top two Michael Irvins doing it on the floor of a bathroom stall? You don't. But here's two women rubbing their ladyparts against each other at a Bruins Game. [Barstool Sports]...

Apparently "Season-Long" Suspension Means Only The Nonconference Season
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Catholic School Teams Make The Best Videos
A reader sent this in to add it to our gallery of team photos. But this deserves its own post, for you see, it's a high school team's music video. And it's every bit as amazing as you could imagine....

Nationals Set To Make History, Fail As Usual
Without the divine intervention of the Royals, Washington would have gone wire-to-wire on ESPN's power rankings. Guess which end of the wire. [ESPN.com]...

The Strangest Dirk Nowitzki Story You'll Ever Read
Deadspin presents to you a look at the burgeoning genre of Dirk Nowitzki fiction. Featuring homoerotic thoughts about Steve Nash, a Christ complex, and Oedipal musings. We are through the looking glass here, people....

Hockey Players Must Humiliate Themselves For National Exposure
Yup, that's Madonna being carried into David Letterman's show by the New York Rangers. The Blueshirts also delivered the first Top Ten list in years to actually have a funny #1. [NYRangers.com]...

Life Threatening Illnesses Are No Excuse For Slacking In Youth Basketball
Youth teams know the surest way to make SportsCenter is to let a child with cancer (also: autism, Down syndrome) play. Another surefire way to make the news: cut a kid from the team after his inspiring recovery from cancer....

HGH Is P.O.'ed At T.O.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....