billyhaisley Page 45 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I Want Some Of What Rod Stewart Had Before The Scottish Cup Draw
May we all be so high on life and/or other substances at one point or another that the simple act of plucking ping pong balls out of a bowl can fill us with the same joy Rod Stewart felt while helping with the Scottish Cup draw....
Arsène Wenger Charged By F.A. After Pushing Referee
Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger has now been formally charged with misconduct by the English F.A. after a spat he instigated with the referees during yesterday’s Premier League match against Burnley....
Behold The Unrelenting Genius Of Lionel Messi's Passes
The danger, if you can call it that, of regularly watching Lionel Messi play soccer—which is to say, to watch one man routinely perform stupefying acts of brilliance the likes of which you’ve never seen before—is that at some point, you run the risk of becoming inured to it....
Former MLSer Quit Team To Be With His Cancer-Stricken Dog
As fans and followers exclusively of high-quality soccer, no one here at Deadspin picked up on the somewhat curious case involving the wonderfully nicknamed MLS player Juan Manuel “Burrito” Martínez and his mutually terminated contract with Real Lago Salado. Reported then only as a “personal issue” ...
David Moyes To Sunderland Fans: Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here
Sunderland are in trouble. The squad is bad, the team is broke, and the man overseeing it all, once-heralded and now cosmically beleaguered manager David Moyes, can’t muster the will to even feign optimism....
Soccer Guy Gets A Goal, A Fiancée, And A Yellow Card All In One Sequence
We can now place public proclamations of everlasting love alongside ugly tackles, bare-chested celebrations, and diving as things that are against the rules in soccer....
What FIFA And The Cameroon National Team Are Doing To Joël Matip Is A Travesty<em></em>
Sepp Blatter may have been ousted from the corrupt and labyrinthine bureaucracy he constructed out of the billions of dollars that FIFA funnels in from the world’s love of soccer, but lest you worry that the organization isn’t as perplexingly, exasperatingly stupid as before, we have the case of Liv...
Dutch Groundskeeper Draws Great Big Snow Dong On Field
It was a chilly Dutch day when Heracles Almelo hosted Groningen in an Eredivisie match this weekend. The visitors didn’t shrink in the face of the cold, though, and gave it to the hosts long and hard in a 4-1 beating....
Harry Kane Doesn't Look Like A Great Player, And Yet He Is<em></em>
Just look at that face. If you showed a bunch of people who didn’t know any better a picture of Tottenham’s unassuming star forward Harry Kane and asked them to guess what he does for a living, I’m quite confident that “pro athlete” would rank way down the list, somewhere behind “accountant,” “hands...
Bad Soccer Teen Cut For Savage Tweets To Premier League Player
Alfie Barker, the 19-year-old striker who before today played in England’s 10th division, watched yesterday’s Bournemouth-Arsenal match and had some thoughts. He was none too impressed with Bournemouth giving up a three-goal lead in the eventual 3-3 draw. And so he sent these tweets to Harry Arter, ...
Missouri Governor-Elect Takes Bazooka To MLS Hopeful's Stadium Financing Plans
Missouri’s recently elected governor, Republican Eric Greitens, is a former Navy SEAL, a devoted humanitarian, and a man who ran a campaign ad that was just 20 seconds of him firing a Gatling gun. All of that means he doesn’t take any shit, not when justice is at stake. The vampires trying to suck o...
Diego Costa And Eden Hazard Are Good As Hell Again
Remember this past summer, when Chelsea were reportedly sniffing around every big-name striker out there in an effort to find a replacement for the once-feared, maybe-fallen (and possibly fat?) Diego Costa, who just a couple season ago looked like a legit (and arguably literal) world-beater? And whe...
Premier League Ref Wants In On The Chinese Soccer Gravy Train
With all of the gargantuan contracts the Chinese Super League has handed out to star(ish) soccer players over the last year or so, it was only a matter of time before those on the sport’s periphery started batting their eyes eastward, hoping to secure some of those seemingly infinite riches for them...
Carlos Tevez Signs With Chinese Team, Will Only Be Super Rich Rather Than Mega Rich
As expected, former Juventus and Argentina national team star striker Carlos Tevez has officially signed with Chinese Super League club Shanghai Shenhua. And while rumor had it that Tevez was set to be the highest paid soccer player in the world, it appears that he’ll have to settle for a spot in th...
IV Treatment Center Might Have Helped Samir Nasri Cheat In More Ways Than One<em></em>
Things are only getting worse for Samir Nasri....
Kevin Durant On NBA's Referee Reports: "I Think It's Bullshit"
On Christmas, the Golden State Warriors blew a big fourth quarter lead against the Cleveland Cavaliers in their first Finals rematch game. The next day, the NBA admitted that the refs blew a couple big calls at the end of the game. This annoyed Kevin Durant, but not in the direction you might think:...
Sam Allardyce Pissed Off At Watford's Mascot For Making Fun Of Player's Dive
When Sam Allardyce, fresh off bullshitting his way out of the England job, returned from his brief absence to the Premier League with Crystal Palace last week, we knew we were in store for a few things: hard-fought, defensively sound wins, Palace’s safety from relegation, and a handful of absurd pub...
Bob Bradley Fired By Swansea City
Less than three months after becoming the first American to manage a club in the Premier League, Bob Bradley has been sacked by Swansea today. Unfortunately, it is well-deserved....
DeMarcus Cousins Really, Really Likes Joel Embiid
DeMarcus Cousins and Joel Embiid went at each other all night in an entertaining battle of the bigs as the Kings beat the Sixers 102-100. Cousins’ 30-7-5 stat line just topped Embiid’s 25-8-1, and judging by the jovial butt slaps and Boogie’s comments after the game, our two protagonists had just as...
Rockets Rookie's Campaign To Bring Back Granny Free Throws Finally Reaches NBA
It’s been a long journey for our intrepid hero, the free throw retro-innovator Chinanu Onuaku. The first-year Houston Rocket managed to toss up a couple of his trademark underhand free throws in a preseason trip to China earlier this year, but tonight was the first time he managed to display his bea...