billyhaisley Page 64 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Pharaoh Stephan El Shaarawy Is Back From The Dead
It’s easy to forget that not all progress follows a smooth curve. Despite the natural desire to contextualize the entirety of a person’s growth in sports into a neat little narrative—one of an emergent, inchoate talent that gradually develops as crawling turns into walking, followed by a rapid ascen...
Check Out The Absurd Backheel Volley This French Guy Scored
Boy, do these dudes in France’s lower tiers know how to score wondergoals. After last week’s backheel-to-overhead kick golazo, we now have Jordan Blondel upping the stakes by sizing up a long ball from his own half, and while backpedaling towards goal, kicking the ball in with his heel. From outside...
Bad Soccer Man Gets Sent Off For Mushing His Own Teammate
What was it with shoving your buddies this weekend? You’re supposed to be brothers, goddammit!...
Panama Papers Reveal FIFA Ethics Committee Member Might Have A Problem With Ethics
Juan Pedro Damiani is a longstanding member of FIFA’s ethics committee, the primary internal body that as of late has been tasked with rooting out the corruption of FIFA’s members and banning them from soccer’s governing body. From what we know about FIFA, it shouldn’t shock you to discover that Dam...
Gonzalo Higuaín Loses His Mind After Getting Red Card
I’m getting the feeling that Gonzalo Higuaín didn’t exactly agree with this referee’s decision. Though maybe shoving everyone on the pitch—including many of his own teammates—is just how he expresses internal disappointment....
USMNT Players Ether Abby Wambach
USWNT legend Abby Wambach has had a rough stretch of late. If you recall a few months ago, Wambach had some very dumb thoughts about foreign players representing the USMNT. This weekend, she was arrested and charged with a DUI. And after that news broke, the USMNT’s Alejandro Bedoya tied both incide...
Only One Moment From Barcelona-Real Madrid Lived Up To The <i>Clásico</i> Name
It’s normally a safe bet that the two Clásicos of any given season will both be among the biggest and best matches of the year. Clásicos pit the two giants of Spain against one another, with teams as rich in talent as in history, in arguably the most intense and passionate rivalry in Europe, and whi...
Well-Meaning German Soccer Team Protests Racism ... With Digital Blackface
Meet Deinster SV, a close-knit soccer club competing in Germany’s eighth division. In a recent incident, two of the club’s black players (and despite what you see above, there are only two) were subject to insults and even physical violence at the hands of some locals. Shocked and horrified, the clu...
ESPN Photoshopped Lionel Messi's Head Onto Sergio Agüero's Body, And It Looks Dumb As Hell
ESPN FC has a horrifying article up the site’s front page headlined “Why Messi could join Man City.” Now, the post isn’t horrifying for its content—I didn’t read it as I have no interest in Messi fanfiction—but rather because of this disturbing Photoshop job that accompanies it:...
Deadspin Up All Night: Feel This Breeze
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let’s go....
Lionel Messi Gives Away Some Shoes, Causes International Incident
Lionel Messi recently sat with Mona El-Sharkawy, the host of Egyptian TV show Yes I am Famous, and the two had a nice, friendly chat. When asked for a souvenir commemorating the interview—a show tradition, according to El-Sharkawy—Messi gifted her his shoes. This has since caused a huge shitstorm....
Attention Thief: MLS Coach Will Buy You New Boots If You Return The 32 You Stole
A shocking crime from great and peaceful nation of Canada: Some as-of-yet unidentified thief reportedly broke into the Vancouver Whitecaps’ training facility Monday night and absconded with a bunch of the players’ boots. Most likely inspired by the surrounding culture, the team’s manager has propose...
Last Night Showed Why The USMNT Still Sucks
In the headliner of last night’s pivotal spread of U.S. international soccer matches, with Jürgen Klinsmann coming under the most fervent and wide-spread criticism he’s met in his tenure as manager, the USMNT performed how they should have and pasted Guatemala 4-0. Like they were always going to. Th...
Soccer Club's Interim Social Media Coordinator Abandons Twitter Duties To Play In Game
Deep in the lowest levels of the English soccer pyramid, the modern club needs its players to fill multiple roles in order to survive. Your backup striker might need to double as the electrician when the lights in the locker room go out. Your utility defender might be called upon to check the team b...
Dimitri Payet Is Too Good At Free Kicks
Seriously. You shouldn’t be able to score from this far out:...
Syria Score An Especially Painful And Embarrassing Own Goal
All own goals are painful for those who score them. This one, though, scored when Syria’s keeper punched a cross straight into teammate Hamdi Al Masri’s face for the ball to ricochet back into their own net, had to hurt even worse than normal, physically as well as psychically:...
Deadspin Up All Night: Came A Long Way From Them Corners
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. There’s more where that came from....
Some French Teen Scored One Of The Goals Of The Season
Pulling off this bicycle kick, as Nice youngster Paulin Puel did this weekend against Monaco in a U19 game, would be impressive enough. But what really puts this one over the top is that backheel flick that sets him up. Put together, and you have a legit stunner....
A Reminder That Anthony Martial Is Still A Goddamn Child
It’s easy to lose sight of the fact that, notwithstanding his huge transfer fee and his multimillion-dollar salary and his formidable size and his surprisingly advanced game, underneath it all, Manchester United forward Anthony Martial is still just a kid....
Just What The Hell Is Going On With Vincent D'Onofrio's Accent In This Pelé Movie?
Pelé—once an inspirational global icon as the widely recognized greatest soccer player of all time, now a smiling leathery husk dragged around the world for the enrichment of his handlers and the brands they license him to—has a movie coming out about his early life. From what we’ve seen in the trai...