dashiell-bennett-old Page 34 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Crazy Old Man Gives Bills The Bird
Unfortunately, that grumpy coot just happens to be the owner of the Tennessee Titans and his affinity for the ol' double deuce is now immortalized on YouTube. If you have hands, feel free to nervously wring them....

Peyton Manning Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Peyton Manning, who won the weekend when it was gift-wrapped with a pretty bow and handed to him by Bill Belichick....

Michelle Wie's Life Is No Longer Worthless
It's about freakin' time that 20-year-old Michelle Wie won a real golf tournament, a two-stroke win in the Lorena Ochoa Invitational. Now maybe she'll give up this silly dream and finally enroll in dental school. [Honolulu Advertiser]...

Where The Wild Oden Are
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Hockey Player's Attempted Murder Conviction Just A Hilarious Case Of Mistaken Identity
Sportsnet.ca has an epic interview with fresh-out-of-prison former Blues player Mike Danton, who says he didn't hire an assassin to kill his former coach/mentor, David Frost. He was really trying to kill his father. Totally different situation! [Sportsnet, via RiverfrontTimes]...

Night Of The Living Customized Jerseys
They're back. As long as people continue to waste money on customized sports clothing we will continue to celebrate whatever it is they're trying to accomplish. It's not a choice ... it's a lifestyle....

Please Don't Mention Eggs To Mike McCarthy. Ever.
The Packers fired a 22-year Lambeau Field employee because coach Mike McCarthy thought he heard the guy tell him, "Don't lay an egg." That sounds about right. I wonder if the Metrodome is hiring? [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]...

A Grim Look At Tim Tebow's Future?
Buried in a flimsy trend story about the, er....resurrection of "John 3:16" madness (courtesy of YouKnowWho, natch) is a more fascinating nugget about the true originator of the craze—who is serving three life terms in a California prison....

Algerian Soccer Team Did Not Sign Up For This
Check out this ridiculous footage of the Algerian bus under siege from rock-throwing Egyptian hooligans. Say....does anyone want my ticket for their World Cup qualifier this weekend? I suddenly have to be somewhere else. [Goal.com, DirtyTackle]...

Steve Nash: NBA Optometrist
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

NFL Mercifully Ends Stupidest Product Placement Ever
Philly's Brent Celek was fined 15 yards for an idiotic TD celebration Sunday, when he raised his right leg just like the doofuses in those Captain Morgan commercials. And yep, the awful rum maker was behind the whole thing....

IceGators Coach Defends His Stick Throwing Temper Tantrum
Brent Sapergia says throwing all his team's equipment on the ice wasn't a stunt. He was just really, really mad! (Says the refs weren't looking out for his players.) Tough, but fair. [Puck Daddy]...

Tennessee Football Players Commit Armed Robbery While Wearing Tennessee Clothing
Three members of Lane Kiffin's much-hyped freshman class were arrested early this morning after robbing someone at a convenience store....in the middle of the Tennessee campus....while wearing Tennessee-branded football clothing. What's the opposite of a perfect crime?...

Brooke Hundley Speaks About "Horrific" Steve Phillips Affair
Good Morning America scored the big "get" in the Steve Phillips saga by landing the first interview with "mistress" Brooke Hundley—an interview that wants to be sympathetic, but mostly focuses in on the pathetic....

No, Vancouver Is The Other Way!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Finally, A Championship That Could Actually Save Detroit
Joe Cada, a 21-year-old from Shelby Township, Michigan, won the World Series of Poker's $8.55 million Main Event prize. That's like half the state's GDP. (By the way, 21 is also Michigan's legal gambling age, so....beginner's luck, right?) [Detroit4Lyfe, Freep]...

Media Continues Psycho-Social Deconstruction Of Elizabeth Lambert, Chick Fights
""Video of the incident has spurred a national debate about sportsmanship, gender roles, double standards regarding aggressiveness and news media coverage and the sexualized portrayal of female athletes." Don't forget Freudian photos of women giving birth to soccer balls. [NYTimes]...

You'd Lose Your Mind Too, If You Had To Coach Hockey In Louisiana
Brent Sapergia only lasted two games as coach of the Louisiana IceGators, but he made them count—getting thrown out of both and making himself internet famous with an epic, bench-clearing temper tantrum....

The Aaron Rodgers "Sack Tracker" Is Why We Have An Internet
What your life needs now is a detailed interactive chart of all 37 sacks made on the Packers QB this season. I think it was just updated as Rodgers was taken down buying lunch at Quiznos. [Madison.com]...

You Can't Drag Baseball Into The 21st Century
Like many others, I assumed that Major League Baseball would have no choice but to cave in and expand the use instant replay this offseason, but I underestimated the league's commitment to completely ignoring public opinion at all times....