dashiell-bennett-old Page 38 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I-TEAM Assemble! Assignment: Sports Fella
Going to the Bill Simmons book signing in NYC tonight? Pictures, stories, and other nonsense welcome. We'd do it ourselves, but ... um. Yeah. [Photo via]...
Congress Gets Involved In Concussion Debate, Fails To Solve Everything
Goodell, along with NFLPA leader DeMaurice Smith and other people in suits, was grilled by the House Judiciary Committee about all this stuff they've been hearing about "concussions" and "permanent brain damage." The Commish talked a great deal about all the many things the league is doing—rule chan...
Olympic Pothead Is Now High On Civil Service
Ross Rebagliati—everyone's favorite dope smoking Olympic snowboarder—is running for a seat in Canada's parliament. You see, in Canada, election districts are called "ridings" and he probably just got confused because he was so freakin' high. [CTV/Victoria Times]...
The NCAA Won't Be Lied To (Or, Why To Avoid Deion Sanders)
Oklahoma State wide receiver Dez Byrant has been suspended for an entire year, not for breaking rules, but for lying about not breaking rules. Because misleading an NCAA investigator is the worst crime a human can commit....
Hockey Players Love The Feel Of Ice On Bare Skin
A junior hockey team in Idaho was banned from the local rink after imitating their NHL idols and holding their own "strip shootout." I guess if the Tampa Bay Lightning jumped off a bridge, you would do that too? [WSOCTV]...
World Series Omens Yankee Fans Don't Want To See
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Man Arrested, Charged With Murder Of Jasper Howard
Police have a charged a Connecticut man with murder, and arrested two others, in connection with the stabbing death of UConn cornerback Jasper Howard. None of the suspects are UConn students. [Hartford Courant; photo]...
Larry Johnson Suspended, Apologizes For The Gay Stuff
Chiefs running back Larry Johnson is awful sorry he called you all fags. He should have used a more acceptable term like "monkeybutts" or "dorkweasels" or even "boogermouths." Then maybe his bosses wouldn't have had to put him on suspension....
Improper Stitching Costs Cross Country Team A Title
There are dumb rule violations and then there are dumb rules being violated, and I'm not sure if I've heard of any regulation stupider than the one that cost a Baltimore high school a county cross country championship....
Griese Taco Crack Leads To Explosive Consequences
ESPN/ABC announcer Bob Griese has been suspended from working this week's college football games, after saying on air that Juan Pablo Montoya was missing from NASCAR's leaderboard because he was "out having a taco". Whoo-hoo! Ten-day weekend! [SI/AP]...
NFL Dementia Study Is Not Exactly "Scientific"
The NFL would like everyone to just calm down about all the brain-melting that they help create every Sunday, at least until they can finish their own personal scientific study that will be totally fair and not at all biased....
Stephen A. Smith's Legacy Summed Up In Stylish Jacket
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Antoine Walker Did Not Manage His Money Well
In 12 years, Antoine Walker made roughly 55 million NBA dollars (after taxes, but not counting endorsement deals.) Yet, he has over $4 million in unpaid debts and faces felony check fraud charges. How the hell did that happen?...
Larry Johnson Meltdown Arrives Later Than Expected This Season (Update)
The Kansas City Chiefs are a disaster, obviously, but look on the bright side—it took permanently disgruntled RB Larry Johnson seven whole games to launch an embarrassing tirade against his head coach. I think that's improvement!...
The Mark McGwire Rehabilitation Project Begins Now
Mark McGwire wants to be loved again. Unfortunately, everyone hates him. So how to remedy that? Simple. Hitch your wagon to Tony La Russa's star. Everyone loves that dude!...
Cedric Benson Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cedric Benson, who won the weekend by making the Chicago Bears look foolish. Granted, he's not the first....
Sam Bradford Reminds You To Not Stay In School, Kids
Cautionary tale Sam Bradford will end his college career with season-ending shoulder surgery and a ticket to the NFL combine. That's the last time he takes career advice from Billy Sims. [NYTimes/MorningNews]...
Like A Kid Out There
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Steve Phillips Fired By ESPN (Updated)
Just days after being outed for having an affair with a younger co-worker, Baseball Tonight analyst and former-Met GM Steve Phillips has been fired by ESPN....
Corporate Layoffs Hit NBA Rosters?
Nearly half of NBA teams will start the season with fewer than the league-maximum 15 players, because many of them can't afford to pay the extra dead weight. Have they considered outsourcing the towel-waving to India ?[AP/ESPN]...