dashiell-bennett-old Page 59 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is Why You Shouldn't Fight Rugby Mascots
That's Egor, the Manly Sea Eagle, and he more than held his own during a recent sideline dust-up. The dooshbag who came out of the stands and sucker punched Egor, got in quite a few headshots. Unfortunately, he was punching a giant foam head....
Kenny Powers Forever And Ever
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Chris Bosh And Friend Sweet Talk The Ladies Via T-Shirt
It's not every day you run into something this unusual and outrageous on the streets of Toronto. Oh, look ... Chris Bosh is there too....
The NBA Has Its Own Adorable Steroid Problem
Orlando's Rashard Lewis has been suspended for the first 10 games of next season after testing positive for steroids. He blames it on over the counter "supplements." It's so cute! Almost like a real sports league! [Orlando Sentinel]...
Michael Crabtree Should Not Listen To His "Advisers"
The people looking out for Michael Crabtree's best interests say that Michael is prepared to hold out for the entire 2009 season and re-enter the draft because in reality, they don't give a crap about Michael Crabtree's interests....
Twitter Provides More Unintentional Hilarity From ESPN
"As social-media sites continue to mature, the clamps are going to tighten on what athletes are allowed to do with it." Yes, those poor athletes. (Twitter got hacked today, btw. They're just like us!) [ESPN]...
MLB Gives Topps Dominion Over All Baseball Cards
Bud Selig's army has signed an exclusive deal with Topps, making them the official baseball card of Major League Baseball. No, this does not make your 16 Ken Griffey Jr. rookie cards valuable again....
Frank Deford Has Noticed That ESPN Has Some Influence
Once a week, Frank Deford ambles down to his local NPR station, talks into a microphone for three minutes, then goes back to his VHS library of women's Wimbledon matches. This week, he had "harsh" words for his some-time employer....
This Is A Future NFL Linebacker
How did Bengals tight end Chase Coffman develop his "legendary" toughness? You guessed it ... mutton bustin'. [Bengals.com; pic via]...
The Eyes Of Texas Are Upon You
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Relax, The Stolen Dennis Rodman Statue Was Not Really A Dennis Rodman Statue
A 70-year-old Vermont gentleman reported that his seven-foot bronze statue of Dennis Rodman was stolen, leading to my favorite story of the week: The AP having to confirm that it was not a Dennis Rodman statue and it wasn't stolen....
Charmin Now The Official Butt Wiping Cloth Of The NFL
No longer content (or rich enough) to rely on cars and beer to fill their advertising accounts, the NFL just inked a $10 million-a-year deal with Proctor & Gamble to designate their crap "Official Locker Room Products of the NFL."...
Tasers And Foul Balls Make For An Eventful Night In Oakland
At most ballgames, you're lucky if one interesting thing happens in your section. A foul ball, a violent arrest, dudes falling down stairs? Well, some lucky A's fans saw it all in the span of about 30 seconds....
Tiger Woods, David Feherty's Soiled Underpants, And You
The PGA gas scandal has taught us a lot about ourselves and about humanity in general, but there is one deeper unexplored question: Why is this the first we're learning about Tiger Woods' obsession with farts?...
Choose Your Own "Mets Disaster" Headline
Luis Castillo sprained his ankle last night falling down the dugout steps. Oh, and Albert Pujols hit a grand slam in the 10th to beat the Metropolitans. Their misery knows no bounds. [NY Post]...
Spend The Night In Roger Federer's Bed
Roger Federer has his own personalized $3,000-a-night suite at the Carlyle Hotel—with monogrammed pillows!—just for the two weeks a year he spends ruling the U.S. Open. Unfortunately, Rafael Nadal has the only key. [Observer]...
Prince Fielder's March Of Vengeance
Nine innings were not enough for the Brewers and Dodgers to settle their differences—even if the 13-run differential says otherwise—so Prince Fielder led his Crew through the bowels of Dodger Stadium on a hunt for Guillermo Mota's head....
Fart-Gate Scandal Blown Wide Open
After what seems like decades of secrecy and lies, America demands to know: Who cut the cheese? Now we may finally have our answer. The conspiracy goes far deeper than any of us could have imagined....and it really stinks....
Sandra Bullock Will Ride Michael Oher To Oscar Glory
For those in the dark, this is the movie version of Michael Lewis' book about Baltimore's No. 1 draft pick Michael Oher, a hulking black kid who was taken into the loving embrace of a lily white family in rural Mississippi after they found him bleeding and hungry on the side of the road. The fact th...
Minor Leaguer Convicted Of Assault After Basebrawl Gone Wrong
Remember that vicious minor league brawl that took an ugly turn when pitcher Julio Castillo chucked a 90-m.p.h. fastball at an innocent fan? It appears that people were not happy about that! And by people I mean judges and prosecutors....