dashiell-bennett-old Page 64 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sports Psychologist Takes Full Credit For Stewart Cink
Who is really to blame for "stepping on a Hall of Famer's neck" and ruining golf forever by not laying down for Tom Watson. Not that jerk Stewart Cink. Send a note to Dr. Morris Pickens, famous sports psychologist, instead....
BB Assassins Take Pot Shots At Tour de France Riders
Two riders were hit by BBs during Stage 13 of the Tour, even though lunatic cycling fans can get close enough to club their victims with baguettes. Why not give your crazy violence a more personal touch? [VeloNews]...
William Ligue's Son Still Proud He Beat Up That First Base Coach
They say it's important to live without regret. And one thing Young Bill Ligue does not regret is thrashing an old man on the field at Comiskey Park when he was 15. You just can't manufacture those kinds of memories....
Tiger Woods To Miss The Cut At British Open
Woods had two double bogeys on the back nine to finish +5, but the projected cut is 4-over. Only his second missed cut at major since turning pro. Old Tom Watson somehow still tied for the lead. [Open Championship]...
Adam Jones "Makin' It Rain": The Video (NSFW)
We compared the Las Vegas Journal Review's massive feature on the Minxx strip club incident to the Warren Report, but now we finally have the Zapruder Film. Video (that's probably not safe work) of Adam "Pacman" Jones making it rain....
Surprise! No One Cares That Manny Ramirez Used PEDs
Manny came back to Mannywood last night, and the fake dreadlocked Dodger fans welcomed him back with open arms, much to the consternation of you know who....
David Beckham Plays Soccer Like Your Dad
Becks was "often behind the play and seemed winded" in his return to the L.A. Galaxy last night, in front of 22,000 Giants Stadium fans. The last time L.A. played at New York, it was 40,000. [AP]...
Hockey Game At Fenway Park To Be Wicked Cold
Bruins officially announce that they will host the Flyers in Fenway Park for next year's Winter Classic, but they'll really have to fling it to get a puck over the Green Monster. [Herald]...
College Athletes Without Insurance Should Try Not To Get Hurt
Being an NCAA athlete is awesome and everything, but if you twist your ankle—or something much worse—there's a good chance your school's health insurance won't cover you. Now put some tape on that and get back in there!...
Jeremy Mayfield Goes To War Against NASCAR And His "Whore" Stepmom
As noted last night, NASCAR says that Jeremy Mayfield failed another drug test, but he has fired back with even more outrageous countercharges—like implying NASCAR's chairman is on drugs and flat-out accusing his stepmother of murdering his father....
Do Not Make C.J. Wilson Your ESPY Wingman
Texas Rangers reliever C.J. Wilson was at the ESPYs for some reason, but since he wasn't nominated for anything (one would assume) he decided to spend the evening busting horny dudes with his Twitter—including a certain noted sportscaster-lothario....
Not Gay Richard Jefferson Let His Girl Down Easy
Richard Jefferson is in full damage control mode after supposedly dumping his fianceé by emailing her at the altar or something. He's setting the story straight about the Black AMEX, the shadiness, and the money. Oh, and the gayness....
Rick Pitino Didn't Do That Thing Karen Sypher Said He Did, Probably
Louisville police will not prosecute Rick Pitino for whatever it is Karen Sypher allegedly tried to blackmail him with. So I guess we'll never get a steamy "Law & Order"-style courtroom drama starring the saucy Cardinals coach....
Have You Seen This Purple Convertible?
Granted, Carolina linebacker Thomas Davis' $136,000 purple and chrome Caprice Classic really blends into a crowd, but it was stolen last week, so holler if you find it. Must be a lot of Panther-loving Prince fans out there. [WFMB/WRAL]...
Lamest Excuse Ever Helps Tennis Player Beat Drug Rap
French tennis player Richard Gasquet told officials that the reason he tested positive for cocaine last March was because he kissed a woman who had cocaine on her lips....and that worked! Suspension over! It's strip club time! [BBC]...
Warning: Don't Give Sidney Crosby Money On MySpace
Believe it or not, Sidney Crosby's MySpace page does not actually belong to Sidney Crosby! Oh, and if you gave the person who does run that page $500 to help save a park, you're an idiot....
Nancy Boys Play Like ... Well, Nancy Boys
Look, when you play for a soccer team from a town named Nancy, headlines like this are inevitable. (What editor could resist?) Especially when you run away from swine flu like a team of little girls. [ESPN]...
Terrell Owens Suddenly Remembers He Has This Thing He Has To Be At
I was surprised to learn "The Superstars" was actually on last night, opposite the All-Star Pregame. (Counterprogramming!) Thanks to the magic of time travel, I have learned that the episode was way more pointless than usual....
Jim Cramer Was Wrong About Lenny Dykstra, Everything Else
Jon Stewart would like to remind everyone that financial "expert" Jim Cramer endorsed Lenny Dykstra as "one of the great ones in this business." And the business he was referring to was not "collecting tobacco juice."...
The Rich Get Richer With ESPY Swag
One of the great ironies of life is that the more money you make, the more stuff you get for free. It's the only reason rich people leave the house. So what do they get for going to the ESPYs?...