dashiell-bennett-old Page 74 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ha Ha ... Tom Brady Fell Out Of A Boat
World's Fanciest Human can't even row a kayak down the Charles River without needing to be rescued from knee-deep water! What's that? Still a good-looking, supermodel-having NFL quarterback? Well....at least I didn't fall out of a boat! [Boston Herald]...
Sean McAdam Is Not A Fan Of Julio Lugo's Defense
"Francona would be wise to lower his expectations with Lugo....The next base hit Lugo takes away will be the first. Seldom has an infielder thrown himself on the ground more and come up with fewer plays." [Boston Herald]...
How Did Green Day Become The SportsCenter House Band?
SportsCenter doesn't often use popular music as background for their various clip packages, but if you watch as much of the show as I do, you may have noticed that only one band ever seems to make the cut....
Only One Week Left In The Brett Favre Saga
Have mercy, the most annoying story in sports will soon be at end! Unless it doesn't end. Which it won't. Because everything Brett Favre does is special and important and you will never be free of his all-seeing ethereal form....
ESPN Now Enabling Lane Kiffin's Recruiting Violations
Stop me if you heard this one before: Lane Kiffin may have committed yet another recruiting violation. I know the man can't roll out of bed without doing something wrong, but does ESPN really need to be his facilitator?...
Does Mike Winters Look Like He's Kidding?
No, umpire Mike Winters was not fucking kidding you when he punched Matt Kemp out on strikes on Saturday and if you think he's fucking kidding you, then you're the one who is fucking kidding yourself....
The First Cut Is The Deepest
If a hockey team scores the first goal of the game in the first five minutes, they have a 70% of winning the game. Just don't tell Gary Bettman or NHL games will only last six minutes. [Live Science]...
High School Track Star Wins Team Championship By Herself
Bonnie Richardson isn't just on the high school track team, she is the track team. And even though she has no teammates, she somehow won the Texas Class A state championship by herself. For the second straight year....
Your Weekend College Baseball Brainsmasher
If you're an aluminum freak in need of a quick primer on the baseball Super Regionals this weekend, try the appropriately titled College Baseball Blog for a preview. Or just root for your favorite color. [CBB]...
A Night On The Town With Alex Rios
Alex Rios was 0-for-5 last night with 5 strikeouts. Oops. Obviously, the only logical response was to wait outside a charity event so you can heckle him on the way to his car....
Stupid Child Labor Laws Ruining American Horse Racing
How did Calvin Borel—who has a chance to become the first jockey to win the three Triple Crown races on two different horses—get so good at his job? Because dangerously illegal backwater death tracks made him that way....
Football, The Layla Kiffin Way
Tennessee is hosting a football clinic designed and held exclusively for women, starring special guest speaker....Layla Kiffin. Dudes already contemplating discrimination lawsuits, cross-dressing options. [Clay Travis]...
Travel Tip #14: Never Take A Road Trip With Mack Brown
Texas' Mack Brown was one of the D-I coaches bunking up on that gladhanding Middle East tour this week, and he was kind enough to keep an online diary so everyone could know how godawful it is live over there....
Tennessee's Ingenious Plan To End The Recession Hits A Snag
Tennessee plans a new tax on professional athletes—but not NFL players because "NFL rules would have penalized the state had it included their guys." Also, the Smokey Mountains to be renamed the Goodell Hills. [On The Forecheck]...
David Ortiz Suffering From Mr. Magoo Syndrome
There are already a million theories as to why David Ortiz has suddenly and cruelly turned into Junior Ortiz, but now David has one of his own to throw into the mix. He needs thicker glasses....
Your Last 300-Game Winner
Did you enjoy Randy Johnson's afternoon skewering of the Nationals? Because you'll probably never get a chance to see that again. (The 300th win part, not the Nationals getting skewered.) [Jayson Stark; Seattle Times]...
Red Wings Show Their Age, Penguins Show Them The Door
For the first time in the Stanley Cup Finals, the Red Wings looked sad and old, while the younger, vitamin-eating Penguins skated circles around them to even the series. And none of us stayed up to watch "The Tonight Show."...
Yorvit Torrealba's Son Rescued From Kidnappers
The Colorado catcher's 11-year-old son and two of the boy's uncles were kidnapped in Venezuela, but escaped before any ransom was paid. The incident was kept quiet by police and MLB until it was resolved. (Safely, thank goodness.) [Denver Post]...
The Problem With Wang
All right that's enough, people. Chien-Ming Wang (pronounced "wong," by the way) has been in the major leagues five seasons now and it has been well established that his surname is an English euphemism for "penis." Ha ha, very funny....