dashiell-bennett-old Page 80 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Hunkification Of Mark Sanchez Begins
No one has any idea when or if Mark Sanchez might quarterback the New York Jets, so if you're going to take advantage of his god-given manliness to sell some magazines get on that now....
What Are The Nuggets Going To Do When WWE Runs Wild On Game 4?
Game 4—if necessary! (oh right)—of the Western Conference Finals is scheduled for next Monday night at the Pepsi Center, but there's a scheduling snafu. "Monday Night Raw" already has the place booked....
Avalanche Coach The Next Victim Of A Roy Family Sucker Punch?
Patrick Roy is reportedly "mulling" an offer to be head coach of Colorado, even though current coach Tony Granato has not yet been fired. If that doesn't work, his sons will just rough Granato up in the parking lot. [Denver Post]...
"The Scott Walker Story" May Need A Different Ending
After he cold-cocked Aaron Ward and scored the series-winning overtime goal against them, Bruins fans probably wished the Hurricanes' Scott Walker would get cancer. Unfortunately for everyone, his wife beat him to it....
Yep, Brett Favre Is Definitely Coming Back
Non-retired football star Brett Favre has called in Dr. Andrews and will (reportedly!) have surgery on his bicep next week—which is not something a 39-year-old typically does unless he wants to play more professional football....
Bodybuilders Flee Event When Drug Testers Show Up
The Belgian bodybuilding championships were canceled this weekend after every single competitor suddenly had to be somewhere else and dropped out. I'm sure the unannounced arrival of the doping officials was just a coincidence....
Kenyon Martin and Mark Cuban: Still Bellyaching
Their series is over, but Mark Cuban and Kenyon Martin are still sniping at each other in the press. I think La La should slap them both in the mouth. [Hoops Hype]...
Terrell Owens Makes Buffalo Seem Like An Exciting Place To Live
Terrell Owens has been a Buffalo Bill for all of about six hours, but he's already the most beloved free agent acquisition in the history of football. Although to be fair....we are talking about Buffalo....
So What Does Jon Gruden Really Think Of His New Employer?
Having a selective memory and no access to Google comes in handy during a job search. That way, when a network hires you to talk football they aren't embarrassed by old quotes like this one....
Jon Gruden Joins "Monday Night Football" Crew. Seriously.
Good news for Kornheiser haters! Tony is officially stepping down as third man in the "Monday Night Football" booth. The slightly more exciting (upsetting? baffling?) news is that Lil' Jon Gruden will take his seat....
Baseball Fans To Be Slightly Less Bleary-Eyed This Fall
For the first time in 30 years (really?), World Series games will start before 8:00 p.m. Eastern this October. So now you can fall asleep in the seventh inning instead of the sixth. [ESPN; photo via LIFE]...
The Minnesota Twins Had A Rough Weekend
Ron Gardenhire's crew arrived in the Bronx just in time for the movers who finally brought over the magical Yankees Magic Machine from the other stadium. Oooooh ... ghosts!...
Adam Burish Survives Horrifying Decapitation Attempt
The Blackhawks lost Game One of the Western Conference Finals yesterday, but Burish's head is still attached to the rest of his body so I guess he has that going for him. Teammate Ben Eager got tangled up with a Red Wing player in the second period and his foot—you know the one with the freshly shar...
Red Sox Fans Still Waiting On David Ortiz
He should break out of this slump any day now. Yup ... any ... day now. [Major League Jerk]...
Deadspin Classic: North Dakota's Nazi-Loving Alumni Donor
Deadspin's archives go far deeper than you probably suspect. Occasionally, we like to revisit these timeless stories and remember the internet the way it was before it existed. Introducing Deadspin Classic.......
Wait ... Michael <i>Irvin</i> Is A Stand Up Guy?
Cowboys scouting assistant Rich Behm is still recovering from the "building" collapse that paralyzed him two weeks ago, but Michael Irvin of all people has swooped in to help out....
Wayman Tisdale Dies At Age 44
The Oklahoma Sooner, 12-year NBA veteran, and "smooth jazz" guitarist passed away this morning after a two-year battle with bone cancer. [Oklahoman]...
Darius Miles Does Not Know How To Keep A Low Profile
Grizzlies forward Darius Miles was arrested yesterday after cops found marijuana in his car during a traffic stop, but some people are wondering if maybe the car itself is a little too conspicuous....
Who's Ready For Non-Olympic Year Swimming?
This guy, that's who! Also, Michael Phelps....who is totally amped to put the stripper orgies, poker parties, and mind-bending drug trips behind him and hop back in the chlorine water. Arrrghgh!...