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Rick Sutcliffe Wants Melky Cabrera Deported
And here we thought the dumbest thing to happen since Melky tested positive for taking testosterone was that Melky and his crew had cooked up a fake website to try to prove his innocence. Pshaw. Melky has not been charged with a crime, but that's of no concern to ESPN baseball analyst/sheriff Rick...

The Six Things You Should Know About Joe Posnanski's Paterno Book
Joe Posnanski has written a mostly sympathetic biography of Joe Paterno, which shouldn't be a surprise, given some of Posnanski's previous statements. It's a book at war with itself. At its best, it's a clear-eyed biography of a guy who became a cautionary tale about the dangers of mythmaking; at it...


Phillies Prospect Makes Home-Run Robbing Catch
That's Derrick Mitchell of the Triple-A Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs reaching above the wall to take away a home run from Toledo Mud Hens catcher Brad Davis in the eighth inning last night. The Express-Times of Easton (Pa.) said it was one of two outstanding catches Mitchell made during the game. We're...

Indians Closer Chris Perez Confronts A's Fan: "Get Your Dick Out Of Your Mouth"
Oh, Chris Perez. Back in May, when the Indians really were in first place, Perez called out Cleveland fans for their lack of support at the gate. Oddly, he also tends to puke on the mound on occasion. And yesterday, in Oakland, a tipster named Mark says Perez was getting heckled by an A's fan duri...

Joe Posnanski Says He Told Joe Paterno He Should Have Done More To Stop Jerry Sandusky
We've obtained a copy of Joe Posnanski's book, Paterno, which is scheduled for release Tuesday. We've already shared some reactions from others who have had a chance to read an advance copy. And while we're still parsing through the book, we're passing along certain details as we come across them....

Deadspin Up All Night: Bigger Than Gasoline
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Sean and Tim will be among those here this weekend for all the meaningful baseball and meaningless football. Hope yours is fun....

This Is The Giant Tree Limb That Hospitalized A Woman In Oregon By Suddenly Falling On Her
Poor Melany Crocker. According to The Oregonian, the 21-year-old rising senior at Linfield (Ore.) College was running at a local park Wednesday evening when the Sweetgum tree branch you see above came crashing down on her. Crocker is a sprinter on the Linfield track team. She was pinned to the groun...


Bryce Harper's Advice To Children: "Losing's Not Fun" And "Be As Sexy As You Can"
Bryce Harper is giving back. He hosted a baseball clinic yesterday, and it turned out to be a pretty big story in the D.C. area. Yeah, yeah, the camp was free for more than 200 children. Right, right, Harper was swell enough to swing by on his day off. OK, OK, Harper presented a giant check to a loc...


Former Columnist And Accused Child Molester Bill Conlin "Enjoying His Retirement" At Undisclosed Location, His Lawyer Says
Bill Conlin's long career as a sports columnist for the Philadelphia Daily News came to a sudden end last December when three women and a man told the Philadelphia Inquirer he had molested them as children. Authorities determined the allegations against him were credible, but that the incidents were...

TV Report On Texas High School Football Team Wins State Title For Repeating The Same Cliché
As Texas's defending Class 1A, Division I champions, the Mason Punchers are the pride of their central Texas town, population 2,000. But I dunno. I just can't think of the right way to sum up the theme of the Punchers' upcoming season. Maybe someone—the head coach, a couple of players, a reporter—...

Deadspin Up All Night: Check The Papers And The TV
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Erik's on his way. There's some baseball. Oh, and a couple of football games that don't count. Talk about 'em down in the discussion, won't you?...

College Football Hall Of Famer Jim Donnan Ran An $80 Million Ponzi Scheme, Says The Other SEC
The feds love to trumpet it when they've charged a sports figure with a crime, and this morning they reeled in a doozy in Jim Donnan, a 2009 College Football Hall of Fame inductee who was formally pinched on some major allegations of securities fraud....

Red Sox Player Mutiny Continues Apace
Injured pitchers two-fisting around the clubhouse! Stabbing the manager in the back! Fans who can't even mourn Johnny Pesky with their pants up! Can it possibly get any worse for those fourth-place Boston Red Sox?...

The Man Who's Now The Managing Editor Of SI.com Is An Expert On Women's Hair
Sports Illustrated has hired a replacement for SI.com editor Paul Fichtebaum, who was kicked up the chain last month to oversee the integration of the magazine's print and web operations. This morning, the company informed staffers that Matt Bean, the vice president for digital product development...

Four Umpires, And Not One Knows The Count
Yes, the job of the men in blue can sometimes be a dangerous one. But most of the time, the gig is just a matter of calling what they see, while also keeping track of exactly where everything stands. Simple, right? Well, things got a bit confusing for all involved during Carlos Lee's ordinary at-bat...

Deadspin Up All Night: Tell Me
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Erik's here soon to be with you as you watch baseball and do other stuff....

Mike Pereira, Who Hates The NFL's Replacement Refs, Used To Be A Backup Replacement Ref
Mike Pereira has been so outspoken in his role as the NFL's hall monitor for Fox Sports that even Bill Belichick is outsourcing his opinion of replacement officials to him. And if the early returns are any indication, the scabs are indeed going to be a disaster. But remember: Pereira used to work fo...