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![Sisters Are Hogging Wimbledon Titles For Themselves [UPDATED]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18f13b350v8wpjpg.jpg)
Sisters Are Hogging Wimbledon Titles For Themselves [UPDATED]
The women's final at Wimbledon is underway, and it's the Williams sisters meeting in it for the fourth time. Who will win? Who will lose? You'll have to wait (or call Richard Williams) to find out!...

I Have Seen The Devil, And He Is A German Cycling Fan
Dios mio! El Diablo! Lucifer, a.k.a. Deutschland's Didi Senft, crashed the Giro of Italy earlier this week in his own unique, horrifically terrifying fashion. You know times are tough when even Satan needs corporate sponsorship....

YouTube: Where Enjoyable Parodies Happen
I solemnly swear never to get sick of these send-ups of the NBA's "Where Will Amazing Happen This Year?" commercials....

If You Ban It, They Won't Come
"It" being "unlimited beer." This, and six other cogent reasons why this year's Preakness might be Baltimore's last....

Good Luck Charm From Girl In Hospital Helps Yanks Win
Here's a nice backstory to the Yankees' comeback win over Minnesota yesterday. Seems Brett Gardner's inside-the-park home run in the seventh was preordained....

Here's The Video From Corie Blount's Sentencing Hearing
Complete with the judge's "Cheech and Chong" line (starting at the 0:50 mark) that gave Chris McKendry quite the case of the giggle fits....

Rookie Millionaire Versus Obsessive Super Fan - Who Ya Got?
Last Wednesday, Marlins' rookie Chris Coghlan hit his first career homerun. He didn't anticipate trouble getting the ball back. Then again, he also didn't anticipate it being caught by professional ballhawk "THE HAPPY YOUNGSTER"!...

Manchester United Secures Third Straight Premier League Title
A 0-0 draw with Arsenal did the trick. Man U is now tied with Liverpool with 18 titles all-time. And now I'm going to stop talking about soccer before I get something wrong....

NFL Recognizes Chad Johnson's Name Change, With Unsurprising Annoying Bureaucratic Twist
The good news for Johnson: the NFL will let him wear his new name on his jersey this year. The bad news? Because of some careless form-filling, it won't appear quite as he'd like....

Michael Phelps Wins First Two Races in Return, Has a Goatee
He easily took the 200-freestyle and 100-butterfly at the Charlotte Ultraswim, and has a chance for another three way wins this weekend. By the time London 2012 rolls around, I'll bet he's sporting full dreadlocks....

Phillies Visit White House
Are they saying "boo" or "Boo-rack"? Get it? Because people from Philly are always booing stuff!...

Bills' Hall-of-Famer Bruce Smith Charged With DUI
All Bills' bad behaviour, all the time! The all-time sacks leader was pulled over and arrested early Friday in Virginia Beach, Virginia....

Bills' Fullback Arrested on Charge of Exposing Sexual Organs
Urgent bulletin! New York City's public masturbation epidemic is spreading Northwards across the state!...

Wake Up In The Morning, Your Alarm Gives Out a Warning...
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Ten Humans, Or Parts Thereof
Programming note: Our beloved Emeritus is traveling this week. Whether it's by air or through space and time, he refused to confirm. In his place, I will be presenting this week's Ten Humans. Sort of....


While You're Watching the Games, Big Red's Watching You
Need another reason to be thankful that potential bracket-buster Western Kentucky got bounced by Gonzaga? Images like this one will no longer haunt your dreams....

Pitt Holds On; Thousands of Brackets Avoid Enraged Shredding
Wow, that got...uncomfortably close for a bit. The top-seeded Panthers survived a big scare from eighth-seeded Oklahoma State, pulling away very late against a Cowboy team that wouldn't go away....

Michael Jordan's Son Leads Team to Illinois High School State Championship
Watching his boy Marcus dominate from his spot in the stands, His Airness was reportedly quite misty-eyed. Maybe he was embarrassed by the Kurt Rambis prescription specs?...