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Deadspin Up All Night: Is This A Lasting Treasure?
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Erik Malinowski will ensure that your last night before the NFL season is a great one....

Keith Hernandez Is Threatening To Shave Off His Mustache
Mets treasure Keith Hernandez tells The New York Times's Richard Sandomir that he might just shave his mustache before the final game of the 2012 season. Hernandez's old Just For Men endorsement deal required that his mustache never go gray, but that contract lapsed earlier this year—"They said our ...

The <em>Post</em> Drew Mark Sanchez As A Very Sad Clown
Today's New York Post, as a whole, crystallizes the 2012 Jets. On the cover, Tebow and Sanchez are depicted as passengers in Rex Ryan's clown car. Sanchez looks especially despondent. But the paper's big season preview article predicts that the Jets will have a winning record and return to the posts...

The Ravens Are Fighting With Their Own Left Tackle On Twitter Only Six Days Before Their Opener
Who will stand up and protect Joe Flacco, Baltimore Ravens QB? Eh, probably no one. We're six days away from the Ravens' opener—Monday night at Cincinnati—and they might be dumping starting left tackle Bryant McKinnie because they're upset about how much they're paying him....

This Is How Relievers Try To Pick Up Ladies Before Ballgames
Say you're a reliever on a newly compelling major league baseball team that rolls into another AL town in the middle of August. Like the Baltimore Orioles' Luis Ayala, for instance. Say you haven't pitched in a few days and you're more bored than you usually are in August, which is very bored. Like ...

Yes, The New Brooklyn Nets Arena Is Deliberately Covered With Rust. No, It's Not A Good Idea.
Elizabeth A. Harris's New York Times piece today asks the question everyone else forgot to ask: Why is the Barclays Center, home of the relocated and rebranded Brooklyn Nets, covered with rust? ...

Michael Johnson Fell Off A Boat During An America's Cup Series Race
So we've written before about how the powers organizing the America's Cup have turned it into NASCAR at sea. (Our old pal Katie Baker wrote more about this on Friday.)...

Rockets GM Daryl Morey Has A Counterintuitive And Analytic Reason For Giving Money To Mitt Romney
Mitt Romney is not a really popular guy, except in the Cayman Islands. Lots of people like him because he's not Barack Obama, and lots of people like him because his party's platform aligns with their personal views, but no one really seems to like Mitt for his essential Mittness. But Daryl Morey, t...

Dead Letters: "Wishing You A Lifetime Of Genital Herpes And Shingles"
Subject: Ephesians...

Mike Francesa Uncorked An All-Timer Of A Rant On The Collapsing Mets
The Mets are in freefall. They just got swept in four games at home by the (now) 50-73 Colorado Rockies. The Mets' starter for the last of those four losses, today's game, was blogger Collin McHugh, making his major-league debut. McHugh threw seven scoreless innings, allowing two hits and one walk, ...



The Baseball Hall Of Fame Probably Wouldn't Change The Rules If Roger Clemens Pitched A Meaningless Game This Year
Yesterday we half-floated a conspiracy theory that Roger Clemens's impending comeback with the Sugar Land Skeeters was a sneaky ploy to reappear in a major league game for the woeful Astros so that he might push his first hall of fame ballot appearance back five years, to 2017. So we reached out to ...

Is This 6-11, 500-Pound Dude From Central Pennsylvania The Largest Football Player Ever?
Aaron Gibson, the former Lions, Cowboys, and Bears offensive tackle, was the heaviest player to ever play in the NFL: He weighed 410 pounds. Richard Sligh, a defensive tackle who played one season for the Raiders while they were still in the AFL, was the tallest man ever to play the sport....

32 Paragraphs About 32 NFL Teams From The <em>Football Outsiders Almanac 2012</em>
The following is excerpted from the team chapters of the always-excellent Football Outsiders almanac. Buy the PDF for $12.50 or order the printed book from Amazon....

Roger Clemens And The Astros Might Just Be In Cahoots
The Astros have a lot of problems. Have you seen the lineup they're running out there every night? It's Jose Altuve, Brett Wallace, and then a lot of quadruple-A players with no business sniffing a big-league starting lineup. Need Justin Maxwell? Astros got him. Need Scott Moore? He's a 'Stro. Wonde...

Bartolo Colon Tests Positive For Testosterone, Suspended 50 Games
Like his Dominican compatriot Melky Cabrera, who also plays on the west coast and tested positive for testosterone and was suspended for 50 games by MLB, Bartolo Colon had recently been playing better than we expected him to. Colon, who pitched for the Yankees last year and Oakland this year, had a ...

Bernie Brewer Wished Randy Wolf A Happy Birthday Right Before Milwaukee Released Him
Bernie Brewer is a fun-loving mascot, even by mascot standards. He wears a mustard mustache and brings joy and malty hops to all the children of the greater Milwaukee area. Usually. Sometimes he has a sick sense of humor. Sometimes he's a raging asshole. Like today....