jackdickey Page 73 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

I-Team: A Reader Wants To Know More About The Buxom Lass Behind Home Plate At Miller Park (UPDATE)
Reader Derek writes in with a pressing question for the trusty, oft-Pulitzer-worthy Deadspin I-Team:...

David Price Has 12 K's Through Five Innings Against The Blue Jays. You Should Probably Watch.
Via ESPN Stats & Info: "David Price: 12 K through 5 IP. That matches what Clemens had through 5 IP in each of his two 20-K 9-IP games and 1 more than Wood thru 5 IP."...

Arian Foster Really Does Not Care About Your Fantasy Team
Foster, last season's rushing champion, tweaked his left hamstring in last night's 49ers-Texans preseason game. He hurt the same hamstring earlier in camp. He appreciates your concern about his semitendinosus, unless you are concerned simply because of your fantasy team....

Pray For Darren Rovell And His Hair To Survive Hurricane Irene
Rovell, CNBC's business reporter, tweets like the battle-weary Marine that he isn't:...

Your Collection Of "What If White Michael Vick Were..." Photoshops
Yesterday, in its infinite wisdom, ESPN gave us White Michael Vick. We're still not sure entirely why, although it "got people talking" in the way that most silly ESPN things do. It also got the crafty minds of the internet a-Photoshoppin'. Here are some of our favorites, though you should send othe...

Johan Santana Wants To Seal The Testimony In His Ongoing Sexual Assault Lawsuit
New York Mets pitcher Johan Santana—forgive us if you didn't need that detail, but Santana hasn't pitched since the middle of last season—was accused last year of sexual assault on a golf course in October 2009. The woman said Santana approached her and raped her, as she was pleading with him to sto...

Derek Jeter And Minka Kelly Have Split, So Here's Your Chance, Dudes
Take that however you want to take it, single heterosexual male Yankees fans....

Now That He's Been Fired, The Town Of Park Ridge, Ill., Wants To Unname "Jim Hendry Way"
Poor Jim Hendry. He's been relieved of his general manager duties in Chicago, after he loaded the team up with bad contracts and badder mojo, and now things just get worse. They want to take away his street sign....

32 Paragraphs About 32 NFL Teams From The 2011 Football Outsiders Almanac
The following is excerpted from the team chapters of the always-excellent Football Outsiders almanac. Buy the PDF for $12 or order the book for $21.95....

Dwyane Wade Tweeted That He Did Not Have A Thing With Lauren London, His Publicist Tells Us
You may have read in yesterday's Shaq email dump, courtesy of the Miami New Times, that Shaq didn't want any part of actress Lauren London (pictured at right) because she was Dwyane Wade's girl....

<em>ESPN The Magazine</em> Decides That Michael Vick Is White Again (UPDATE)
OK. We give up. ESPN has murdered our mole and made Vick white again. Evidently, they are entitled to their own truths....

<em>ESPN The Magazine</em> Replaces White Michael Vick With Black Michael Vick
Yes, Michael Vick is black again. The weird white photo illustration has been replaced with the above shot. Commend yourselves, people of the blogs and Twitter. You've vanquished ESPN stupidity in record time....

Who Does <em>ESPN The Magazine</em>'s White Michael Vick Look Like, And Why Is He Here?
The weird photo illustration (AJ says he looks like Brian Austin Green; do you have other ideas?) accompanied a weird story from ESPN: The Mag's Vick issue. We are dumbfounded. ...

Chad Ochocinco Says He Will Reimburse The Buccaneers Rookie Who Jacked Him Up And Got Fined $20K
Rookie Buccaneers linebacker Mason Foster may have two first names, but he doesn't have a lot of money. He's a rookie, and a third-round pick, which means $20,000 means more to him than it does to, say, Chad Ochocinco, the Patriots receiver Foster hit in last Thursday's preseason game....

Sportswriting's Gonna Be OK, Everybody: Bleacher Report Just Secured $22 Million In Venture Capital
Per Darren Rovell, the funding came from Oak Investment Partners. At Bleacher Report, money DOES grow on trees!...

Kerry Collins Will Never Bow To The Sands Of Time
Indianapolis Colts owner Jim Irsay on Twitter: "We have agreed to terms with Kerry Collins...more details to come." The details being: Indy is hopelessly fucked should soon-to-be-39-year-old Kerry Collins have to play a snap in that offense....

Leaked Emails Show A <em>Newsweek</em> Reporter Trying To Set A Picky Shaq Up With Some Girls (He Only Wants Rihanna)
As far as we know, Shaquille O'Neal—divorced a few years back—is happy with his comically out-of-proportion lover, Nicole "Hoopz" Alexander....

Ohio Man Rams A Store With A Semi Truck So He Can Steal An $800 Synthetic Vagina (UPDATE)
Ah, Ohio. Home of the drunken werewolf and the teacher who sprayed cops with her breast milk. Now the Smash and Grab Sex Toy Thief of Lorain County joins them....

US Marines Serving In Afghanistan Warned Not To Fart So Audibly
Battle Rattle, a Military Times blog, has an important dispatch from the front lines, which they wanted us to share with you. So often we forget about the sacrifices our troops abroad make to protect this nation's freedom. Sacrifices like sphincter clenching....

Sally Jenkins's Pat Summitt Piece Will Break Your Heart
Jenkins, the longtime Washington Post writer, is one of Summitt's best friends. She discloses that in her piece, which you should read now....