miserableshitehawk Page 38 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Dolphins Improvise Delightful New Way Of Advancing Upfield
It’s been a funny night in Houston. The Texans were hit with a personal foul for making contact with a long-snapper. Danny Amendola threw a touchdown. DeAndre Hopkins had one of the most insane catches you will ever see nullified by offsetting penalties. But the wildest play of all has to be this ri...
Dolphins Gifted Red Zone First Down On Highly Suspect Illegal Contact Penalty
The NFL’s rules about who can hit who and when, and how, and where, are even more confusing than I thought. Tonight the Dolphins were gifted a first down and half the distance to the goal on a call I’m not sure I’ve ever seen before: a personal foul against the Texans for making contact with, uh, th...
Report: The Broncos' Ownership Situation Is Getting Messy
Control of the Broncos organization was passed to a trust in 2014, when Annabel Bowlen announced that her husband, team owner Pat Bowlen, was too diminished by Alzheimer’s disease for him to continue running the team. The Broncos won the Super Bowl the following season, but the years since have been...
Daryl Morey Is Daring Tom Thibodeau To Say No
Jimmy Butler’s trade demand has yet to be fulfilled at least in part due to a conflict of priorities inside the Timberwolves organization. Owner Glen Taylor reportedly favors a quick resolution and may be willing to trade Butler for players or picks with more long term than immediate value. Head coa...
Public Service Announcement: Do Not Tug On Steph Curry's Brother's Shorts For Any Reason
Steph Curry seemed like he was in a frisky mood in pregame warmups, but no one could possibly have anticipated just how frisky. Steph put 51 points on the board through three quarters against the Wizards, on an absolutely insane selection of wild-ass, irresponsible shots:...
The Red Sox Are Rolling And It Blows
The Red Sox took a 2–0 lead in the World Series Wednesday night. It is befitting of this hell universe that another Boston sports team is on the cusp of winning a championship....
Clearly Steph Is Bored With Basketball As We Know It
When you’re Steph Curry, and there’s no shot available in the normal course of a basketball game that you can’t make with your eyes closed, eventually you reach a point where you need to invent strange and avant-garde forms in order to feel alive. This is the weird outer realm of galactic-brain shot...
Pelicans Brass: Please Stop Calling Our GM A Pile Of Poop
Dell Demps has not had a great run as general manager of the New Orleans Pelicans. Mostly he has squandered the early part of Anthony Davis’s career, weighing down the roster with stiffs like Ömer Aşik and Alexis Ajinça, and making years’ worth of win-now moves that never actually produced a sustai...
NBA Admits Refs Were Suckered By Joel Embiid's Theatrics
Joel Embiid got Andre Drummond ejected during the final minute of regulation in Tuesday night’s eventual overtime Pistons win, by throwing himself on the floor like a big old goof after incidental contact with Drummond’s hand. The two behemoths have spent the hours since chirping at each other throu...
Blake Griffin Overwhelms The Sixers, In 2018
I don’t know if I’ve ever exactly forgotten about Blake Griffin, but certainly the time spent last season toiling away on irrelevant Clippers and Pistons squads didn’t help restore any of the prestige lost during three seasons spent mostly in injury hell. It seems like whole eras have passed since G...
Shameless Joel Embiid Flop Gets Andre Drummond Tossed From One-Possession Game
This moment didn’t wind up deciding Tuesday night’s excellent Sixers-Pistons game, but certainly removing his counterpart from the game made it a worthwhile ploy for Joel Embiid. With the score tied in the final minute of regulation, Embiid beat Andre Drummond to the cup for a tough bucket; as the b...
The Rapidly Expanding Rajon Rondo-Chris Paul Beef Now Includes Daryl Morey And Glen Davis
Things get exhausting now much more quickly than ever before. Whereas the great NBA beefs of old could unspool interestingly over the course of years, this latest Rajon Rondo-Chris Paul beef has gone from punches (and spit) flying to maybe the NBA should go back to bed for a couple months in just un...
Zach Smith Is Gloating Online About His Disorderly Conduct Plea Deal
Former Ohio State wide receivers coach Zach Smith pled guilty to disorderly conduct Tuesday, as part of an arrangement that brings some closure to multiple allegations of domestic abuse made by Courtney Smith, his ex-wife. The deal reportedly also includes a protection order:...
Celebrating Goober Shooed Away From Lakers Bench After Hitting $30,000 Half-Court Shot
Lots of basketball happened tonight. Much of it was meaningless, or ridiculous, or both. This here is the basketball highlight of the night, though it happened during halftime:...
The Celtics Should Consider Doing More Scoring
Here’s an annoying early season NBA trend: The Boston Celtics, favorites to gain supremacy in a LeBron-less Eastern Conference, have the worst offensive rating in the NBA, following an ugly 93–90 home loss to the lowly Orlando Magic Monday night. In a season thus far marked by outrageously prolific ...
Roman Reigns Announces Leukemia Diagnosis On WWE Raw, Relinquishes Universal Championship
WWE Universal Champion Roman Reigns announced to a stunned Monday Night Raw audience that he’s been battling leukemia for 11 years, and that due to the cancer’s return he will be relinquishing his belt, effective immediately:...
Don't Miss The Kemba Walker Show
A surefire way of embarrassing yourself is by saying anything optimistic-sounding about the Charlotte Hornets based on something they do in the first month of an NBA season. They finished each of the last two seasons with 36 wins, and their biggest roster upgrade headed into this season involved jet...
