miserableshitehawk Page 46 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
![Khalil Mack's Raiders Backup, On This Most Auspicious Day: [Facepalm]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/bekoutfxd05iyio3mkva.jpg)
Khalil Mack's Raiders Backup, On This Most Auspicious Day: [Facepalm]
With All-Pro defensive end Khalil Mack headed to the Chicago Bears, the Raiders will turn to rookies P.J. Hall and Arden Key to step up along their defensive line. Key, in fact, is in line to nab Mack’s starting job. A promotion! So how is the rookie feeling about this latest roster development?...
Aaron Boone Tops Ron Gardenhire In Battle Of Colorful Manager Meltdowns
Jordan Zimmermann was working on a no-hitter in the bottom of the fifth inning Friday night when home plate umpire Nic Lentz gave him a strike against Gleyber Torres on a fastball that sure looked like it missed off the inside of the plate. Yankees manager Aaron Boone, who was apparently already dis...
In Stunning Role Reversal, Tony Romo Advances On Opponent's Choke-Job
Tony Romo advanced to the first stage of Web.com Tour qualifying on Friday, after shooting a 2-over 74 to finish tied for 37th at Lantana Golf Club near Dallas. The finish left Romo just one measly shot short of the cut, a devastatingly slim margin. But! Fortune turned Romo’s way when an opponent ch...
Gio González Takes A Break From Weeping To Reassure Brewers PR People: "But I'm Happy! I Am Happy."
The Nationals traded lefty starter Gio Gonzalez to the Milwaukee Brewers on Friday, the last day that players can move between teams and remain eligible to play in the postseason. Gonzalez has been in Washington since 2012; during that time he’s gotten married, had a couple kids, and entrenched hims...
Reports: Raiders Trade Khalil Mack To Chicago For Two First-Round Draft Picks
The Khalil Mack extension saga in Oakland seems to have drawn to an unexpected close. Rather than reach an agreement with their all-world defensive end, the Raiders have reportedly agreed to trade him to the Chicago Bears....
Tom Jurich's Kid Throws Wild Hissy Fit Over The Location Of His Disgraced Dad's Louisville Tickets
Mark Jurich, son of former Louisville athletic director Tom Jurich, is extremely, extremely pissed about the location of the 20 years’ worth of tickets granted to his family as part of his dad’s termination last autumn. The tickets are not the tickets they’re used to, and Mark is reading an awful lo...
Was This Raccoon Witch Cursing The Baltimore Orioles? An Investigation
The Baltimore Orioles came into Wednesday night a horrendous 52.5 games out of first place in the AL East, and an equally shocking and horrifying 40.5 games back of the AL Wild Card. All of that sucking and losing happened before 8:33 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, when it was announced that this devi...
Marlins To Allow Musical Instruments At Otherwise Deathly Quiet Marlins Park
The Marlins have the worst home-field advantage in baseball, drawing a whopping 4,600 fewer fans per home game than the next lowest average attendance in the league. If you bring a harp to a Marlins home game and use it to play a soothing acoustic version of “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” during the...
The NBA's Crappy One-And-Done Rule Is One Big Step Closer To Death
The NBA is steadily laying the foundation for the end of the rule requiring basketball prospects to wait a year after graduating from high school before declaring for the NBA Draft. Adam Silver has been making noise about this for a while, and Condoleezza Rice’s otherwise useless commission recommen...
Leave It To Adam Schefter To Congratulate The Raiders For Tossing A Pittance At Oakland Taxpayers
Mark Davis is yanking the Raiders out of Oakland because he couldn’t get Oakland taxpayers to pony up three quarters of a billion dollars to buy him a new stadium in town. The Raiders have a large and passionate fan base in Oakland, and Oakland is situated in one of the country’s largest and healthi...
Mark Reynolds Punctuates Meltdown By Throwing Batting Gloves At Umpire
Nationals international man of mystery Mark Reynolds was displeased by a called strike three in the top of the eighth inning in Tuesday night’s game against the Phillies, when umpire Sam Holbrook rang him up on an 0–2 outside fastball after an enthusiastic frame-up by Phillies catcher Jorge Alfaro. ...
Butthead Knicks "Fan" Has Just The Dumbest Reason For Selling His Fandom On eBay
Warning: If you read what is on the other side of this link, soon you will want to do murder, and possibly even self murder. It’s an Ian Begley story about an attention-hungry millennial doofus who sold his NBA fandom to an even more desperately attention-hungry millennial doofus for an irritatingly...
Delightful Clown Show Opens Up Flood Gates In A's-Astros
The Oakland Athletics jumped out to 4–0 lead early in Monday’s big tilt with the division leading Astros. The A’s have been hot as hell, and closed Houston’s lead in the AL West to a game and a half, and this had the look of another stirring Oakland victory to kick off an all-important series in Hou...
Michael Conforto Crushes Poor Baseball Into Outer Space
What we have here is a Mets [checks notes] highlight? No, wait, that can’t be right....
Former WWE Personality Threatens To Kill Himself At Monday Night RAW In Extremely Ill-Advised Joke
Former WWE personality Jason Sensation, who made a name for himself in wrestling during the late 1990s by doing solid impressions of famous wrestlers—most notably Owen Hart during an infamous skit with D-Generation X—threatened to kill himself inside Scotiabank Arena in Toronto during tonight’s RAW:...
Hue Jackson Doesn't Sound Real Happy With His Loudmouthed Defensive Coordinator
Browns head coach Hue Jackson was asked Monday about some especially harsh comments defensive coordinator Gregg Williams made about an injury suffered by rookie Denzel Ward, who suffered back spasms after successfully tackling Eagles tight end Zach Ertz in a preseason game. Jackson does not seem rea...
Deadspin Up All Night: On And On
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Eat carbs....
Hustlin'-Ass Cardinals Plate Two On Two-Out Infield Chopper
It sickens me to acknowledge this, but the dreaded Cardinals made a very cool play in today’s game in Colorado. They loaded the bases with two down in the top of the first inning against Rockies starter Tyler Anderson, with Austin Gomber at the plate, and the speedy young Harrison Bader at second ba...
Doug Pederson, Scolding Reporter For Asking Same Question A Different Way: "Ask It A Different Way"
By my count, Eagles head coach Doug Pederson was asked five different times about the status of Carson Wentz in his Sunday afternoon press conference. The first was something like “has Carson been cleared for contact,” and from there the assorted reporters tried out a few promising variations....
Milwaukee City Attorney Blames The Victim In Sterling Brown Police Brutality Lawsuit
The Milwaukee City Attorney—a man named Grant F. Langley—surprised the Mayor and anyone with even the vaguest sense of right and wrong when he filed a court document in Sterling Brown’s civil rights lawsuit Friday placing blame for police actions that led to the disciplining of 11 different officers...