miserableshitehawk Page 47 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kendrys Morales Is Out Of His Damn Mind Right Now
Kendrys Morales clubbed the bejeezus out of a Vince Velasquez fastball Sunday afternoon, sending it into the stands in right field for his 21st dinger of the season. 21 is not a huge number, but here’s what’s wild: Morales has hit more than a third of those home runs in the last seven Blue Jays game...
DeAndre Yedlin Assists On Newcastle Equalizer (Yay), Scores Chelsea Game-Winner (Oof)
DeAndre Yedlin—just too old to be considered one of the American wonderkids, but still a promising youth—played a crucial role in Chelsea’s 2–1 victory over Newcastle Sunday, scoring the decisive goal in the 88th minute to punctuate a dominant Chelsea performance. Tragically, Yedlin plays for Newcas...
Kiko Alonso Makes Important Third-Down Tackle, Promptly Runs To The Wrong Sideline
Late in the first quarter of Saturday’s Dolphins-Ravens preseason tilt, Dolphins linebacker Kiko Alonso brought down Maxx Williams on a short completion on third-and-17, forcing the Ravens to bring on their field goal unit. Alonso kind of rolled off of Williams, then trotted over to the sideline. Th...
Power Outage Somehow Not The Most Awkward Part Of Walk-Off Dodgers Win
The power went out in the bottom of the 12th inning Saturday night at Dodgers Stadium, with Matt Kemp on second base and Justin Turner at the plate. For the second time this season an outage was attributed to “a disruption in the city’s power feed to the facility,” which is the same thing as saying ...
High School Football Game Descends Into Chaos After Reports Of Shots Fired
The Benton Panthers and the Bryant Hornets held their annual Salt Bowl football game Saturday at War Memorial Stadium in Little Rock, Arkansas. The game, which drew more than 38,000 fans on a steamy 92-degree day, was going along swimmingly—Bryant was leading 28-14 in the third quarter—when what sou...
Report: ESPN's Gutless Future Will Not Include Jemele Hill
One week after new president Jimmy Pitaro articulated his bold new vision for the future of ESPN—neuter it and lay submissively at the feet of Roger Goodell—comes a report that Jemele Hill will be leaving the company later this week:...
Deadspin Up All Night: Cepa Andaluza
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let the blog times roll....
Icy Dead People
Flyers goalie Alex Lyon will apparently wear a mask commemorating goofy M. Night Shyamalan horror flick The Sixth Sense this upcoming season....
Players' Attorney In Sexual Misconduct Case Shreds Maryland Athletic Department As "Dysfunctional Viper Pit"
Donald Jackson, the Alabama-based attorney paid using athletic department funds to represent two players accused by a fellow student of sexual assault, ripped the Maryland athletic department Friday, describing it as “a dysfunctional viper pit” defined by “political gamesmanship, internal backbiting...
High School Football Participation Drops For Second Straight Year
The annual National Federation of State High School Associations survey of high school athletics was released Friday. The good news is overall high school sports participation increased for the 29th consecutive year, led by an increase of more than 15,000 participants in girls’ sports. The, uh, also...
Report: Turns Out It Was DJ Durkin Who Meddled In That Sexual Misconduct Case
Former Maryland athletic director Kevin Anderson took a beating this week from the university when it was revealed that athletic department funds were diverted to hire and retain a lawyer to represent two players accused of sexual misconduct in 2017. Now it appears that Anderson might’ve been a fall...
Disgruntled Heavyweight Underdog Flees Ring Immediately After Opening Bell
Hot-shot heavyweight Efe Ajagba came into Friday night’s televised bout in Minneapolis a pristine 5–0 as a professional, with all five fights ending in knockouts, and four of those ending in the first round. He went to bed Friday night still undefeated, having notched his fifth first-round victory, ...
Urban Meyer Gets Around To Addressing Courtney Smith
That Ohio State football types are willing to bulldoze the most direct path to a resumption of business as usual should surprise exactly no one—by and large this is the approach that will most suit the kinds of all-in lunatics who throw Urban Meyer rallies and shit—but Meyer’s shameless “I’m just so...
Raptors Resort To The Old Hire-His-Buddy Trick To Woo Kawhi Leonard
The Toronto Raptors have reportedly hired someone named Jeremy Castleberry away from the Spurs to join their coaching staff. This is noteworthy because Castleberry played basketball with Kawhi Leonard in high school, and at San Diego State, and worked with Kawhi in San Antonio, and according to ESPN...
Anthony Rizzo Wipes Out On Swing, Homers Anyway
Anthony Rizzo is a strong, strong fellow. Watch him eat shit on this 80-mph first-pitch curveball from Jordan Zimmermann, and also muscle the ball over the wall in right field for his 19th dinger of the season:...
Outgoing Transfer Accuses Texas A&M Of A Boatload Of NCAA Violations
The NCAA’s new transfer waiver rule lets players make the case that they should be allowed to play right away at their new schools, so long as their transfer was triggered by hardships beyond their control. Holding aside, for the moment, that requiring a waiver in the first place is bogus and unfair...
Senators Assistant GM Randy Lee Resigns Due To Ongoing Bus Driver Harassment Case
Ottawa Senators assistant GM Randy Lee was suspended back in June following a May arrest in Buffalo for harassing a 19-year-old hotel shuttle driver during the NHL scouting combine. With that case still pending and his time away from the team now approaching the end of its third month, Lee today off...
Driving Into A Raging Wildfire Seems Extremely Not Fun
The western half of the United States—and specifically the Pacific Northwest—is currently burning away to nothing, no thanks to California’s policy of, uhh, diverting water into the ocean or something. Major fires are right now burning in Northern California, Oregon, Washington, Idaho, and western M...
NFL To Produce "Updated" Tutorial Video For Bullcrap New Helmet Rule
The NFL’s new helmet rule is looking more and more like a big old dud. Nobody understands how to apply it—not coaches, not the players, not even the officials who are tasked with spotting violations in realtime. The line that separates a legal tackle from an illegal one is evidently thin and vague e...
Braves Rookie Ropes First Career Base Hit To Right Field, Wait, Oh No!
20-year-old Braves pitcher Bryse Wilson was called up to start Monday’s game against the Pirates. Wilson was drafted in 2016; he started this season in the Class-A Advanced Florida State League, but graduated to Double-A Mississippi after just five starts, and was in Triple-A Gwinnett by the start o...