miserableshitehawk Page 62 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Deadspin Up All Night: Midnight Sun
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Enjoy yourself, yeah?...
Who Is The True Villain In This Dumb Story Of A Golfer Getting Sucker Punched?
Follow along with this story of a golf punching and help me decide who is the actual villain, here. The setting is Coral Creek Club in Charlotte County, along Florida’s gulf coast. Two men—Marc Dull and Jeff Golden—were playing out the final holes of the hotly contested Mid-Amateur Championship, whe...
Luka Doncic Wraps Historic Season With EuroLeague Title, MVP, And Final Four MVP
Slovenian wonderteen and sure-fire top-three pick in the upcoming NBA draft Luka Dončić led his Real Madrid team to a EuroLeague title Sunday, in an 85-80 win over Fenerbahce Dogus Istanbul. Doncic scored 15 points on eight shots, and after the game was named EuroLeague Final Four MVP....
Oh Nothing, Just Another Mighty Walk-Off Dinger From Vladimir Guerrero Jr.
The New Hampshire Fisher Cats entered the bottom of the seventh* inning Sunday down 5-3 to the Binghamton Rumble Ponies. The very brink of a loss! Whatever would they do? Whosoever could save them from these dire circumstances?...
José Bautista Shifts Into The "Too Crummy Even To Play Third Base For The Atlanta Braves" Stage Of His Career
José Bautista’s unexpected and endlessly depressing stint as a third-baseman for the Atlanta Braves, kicked-off ominously with a one-year minor league contract in mid-April, has not produced the way anyone involved might’ve hoped: Bautista is hitting a putrid .143 with an alarming .593 OPS in 40 pla...
The Preakness Was A Foggy, Muddy, Wonderful Mess
The Preakness, held Saturday at Maryland’s Pimlico Race Course, fucking ruled! The race itself was fine: the favorite won; the favorite was also the horse that won the Kentucky Derby; therefore the actual Preakness Stakes did the job of getting the broader non-gambling world through May with reason ...
The Rays Are Making History With Strange New Pitching Strategies
The Rays announced last week an extremely unusual, cosmic-brain plan for the immediate future of their pitching rotation: rather than the traditional approach of deploying a starting pitcher to work through the opposing lineup a few times before yielding to the bullpen, manager Kevin Cash decided to...
LeBron In Full Must-Win Mode Is An Unsolvable Problem
The Cavs opened Game 3 with a huge 22-6 run, and that was more or less that. This was not a case of the winning team grabbing an early lead behind a fluky start and nursing it cautiously until the final buzzer—the Cavs were forceful and decisive early, and did some cool and different things to chall...
Deadspin Up All Night: Overthrown
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Enjoy the horses....
Benches Clear In Cubs-Reds After Bold Pitcher Stare-Down
Reds reliever Amir Garrett punctuated an inning-ending strikeout of Javier Baez in the seventh inning Saturday with a triumphant shout, loud enough to be audible over the television broadcast, followed by an aggressive stare-down of his vanquished foe. Unwritten rules and athlete egos being what the...
Gianluigi Buffon Ends 17-Year Juventus Career With Win, Serie A Title
Legendary Juventus keeper Gianluigi Buffon was substituted out at about the hour mark of today’s match against Verona. The appearance will be the last in Buffon’s incredible 17-year run at Juventus. As you can imagine, it was an emotional moment:...
Cowboys Receiver Terrance Williams Arrested After Crashing Lamborghini
Cowboys wide receiver Terrance Williams was reportedly arrested Saturday morning and charged with public intoxication following a crash involving his Lamborghini, according to ESPN:...
Worthless Jedi Absolutely Humiliated By Cunning Novice
Astros mascot Orbit, who is also apparently a Jedi, was challenged to a lightsaber duel by Indians shortstop Francisco Lindor on Friday. Gotta say, I am starting to believe more and more in Luke Skywalker’s bitter “actually the Jedi are busters” preachings:...
Petty-Ass Derek Jeter Yanks Credentials From Radio Host Who Tracked Down Marlins’ Overseas Corporate Office<em></em>
Last month Miami radio host Andy Slater joined Marlins Man on an investigative trip to the British Virgin Islands, where they learned that the corporate address of the Miami Marlins was a post office box, listed in order to establish the Marlins as a foreign company, for the most cynical of reasons....
J.J. Watt Offers To Pay Funeral Costs For Santa Fe High School Shooting Victims
A gunman armed with a shotgun and a pistol murdered ten innocent people at Santa Fe High School, outside Houston, on Friday. A relatively minor concern for those victims’ families and friends will be how to foot funeral costs for their loved ones, but this news will nonetheless ease their terrible b...
Johnny Manziel Signs Contract To Play In Canadian Football League
Johnny Manziel, a prolific college quarterback whose career was put on hold for two years of mandatory service in the Cleveland Browns organization, will finally experience what it means to play for a professional football team: ...
Shortstop Pedro Florimon Pitches Perfect Inning, Then Socks Mighty Dinger
The dreaded Cardinals chased Phillies ace Jake Arrieta after just three innings in Friday night’s gloomy, rain-delayed tilt in St. Louis. The score was then 4-0; by the time reliever Drew Hutchison finished the sixth inning it was 9-2; the game finally became a laugher when Yacksel Rios allowed anot...
Deadspin Up All Night: Energy
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Take it easy out there....
Cavs Comprehensively Wrecked By Scrappy Celtics
Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals was never close. The Celtics went on a 17-0 run in the first quarter, and that was that. The central question of this series is whether Boston’s impressive team defense will be able to slow down a Cavs offense that ranked number one in the NBA in offensive eff...
Mookie Betts Makes Baseball Look Too Damn Easy
Red Sox outfielder Mookie Betts is having a ridiculous season. He leads the majors in dingers and runs and batting average and OPS, and he’s 25 years old, and, not coincidentally, his team is tied for the best record in baseball. And he’s a two-time Gold Glove winner. And he bowls perfect games. It’...