miserableshitehawk Page 65 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
All Hail Franchy Cordero, San Diego's Dong-Smashing Superhero
Excellently named Padres outfielder Franchy Cordero can sure launch a goddamn tater. He plays in San Diego, which is as obscure a professional baseball outpost as you can find without going to the minors, but we should all be paying attention to young Franchy. According to Statcast, Cordero has alre...
Pour One Out For Joe Prunty, Who Turned A Bunch Of Shit Into A Pile Of Shit
Here’s a pretty remarkable stat: the Bucks used 16 different lineups Saturday night, in their Game 7 loss to the Boston Celtics; the five most used lineups of the bunch played about 35 minutes, and finished plus-11; the other 11 lineups played a total of just over 13 minutes, and were outscored by a...
Deadspin Up All Night: Relax Yourself
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Catch you tomorrow....
Eagles Use Late Draft Pick On Humongous Rugby League Man
The late stages of the NFL player draft are for kickers and special-teamers, and for taking fliers on long-shot contributors. Saturday afternoon the Super Bowl-champion Eagles made the long-shot-est of long-shot selections in the 7th round of the 2018 draft when they selected the gigantic and tanta...
Oklahoma Softball Scores Unconventional Run
The third-ranked Oklahoma softball team beat the Texas Longhorns by a score of 7-1 today. The win featured a grand slam, but the highlight of the game is this here example of extremely creative base-running, by senior catcher Lea Wodach, who scored the go-ahead run in extremely unconventional fashio...
Grim And Gritty Ricky Rubio Will Be Grimly And Grittily Cheering From The Bench In Game 1 Of Jazz-Rockets
Ricky Rubio, who looks like the very happiest bearded child in that damn photo up there, will reportedly not be available for Game 1 of Jazz-Rockets, to be played Sunday afternoon in Houston. The hamstring injury that sidelined him for most of the final game of Utah’s series-clinching win over OKC w...
One-Handed Linebacker Shaquem Griffin Drafted By The Seahawks, Who Employ His Twin Brother
Central Florida linebacker Shaquem Griffin, a one-handed player who runs like the wind and conquered the bench press, has been selected by the Seattle Seahawks in the fifth round of the 2018 NFL Draft. I urge you to watch these two videos of his selection, because they’re great:...
Video Shows Former NFL Player Being Tackled And Choked By Police Over Parking Lot Argument
Desmond Marrow, a former college football player at Toledo, shared video on Facebook this week of him being violently roughed up by three police officers during an arrest back in December, in Georgia. The video shows Marrow being handcuffed by two uniformed officers, after which one of the officers ...
The Raptors Finally, Mercifully Spared Us Any More Of The Washington Wizards
The Wizards, who won 43 games during the regular season—that’s three fewer than the Denver Nuggets, who failed to make the playoffs in the much tougher Western Conference—and were the Eastern Conference’s 8th seed, were eliminated on their home floor by the Toronto Raptors Friday night. ...
Shohei Ohtani's Dinger-Smoking Heroics Cut Short By Injured Ankle
Shohei Ohtani smoked another home run Friday night, his fourth of the season. This one came off a sizzling 97-mph fastball from Yankees pitcher Luis Severino that appeared to be well off the plate inside:...
The Thunder Were The Ugliest Version Of Themselves In Game 6
The Utah Jazz dispatched the Oklahoma City Thunder Friday night, closing out the first round series with a narrow and vaguely controversial victory on Utah’s home floor behind more stout defense and just enough shot-making from their various role-players. Donovan Mitchell was fantastic, dropping in ...
Deadspin Up All Night: Just What I Needed
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Later, gator....
Giants' Brandon Belt Works Historic 21-Pitch Plate Appearance, To No Avail
Brandon Belt of the Giants worked an insane 13-minute, 21-pitch plate appearance in the top of the first inning today, against Angels starter Jaime Barria. This strikes me as almost a troll move! Barria faced six batters in the inning, gave up three singles, and loaded the bases—he threw 28 pitches ...
Hoo Boy, Bucks-Celtics Is A Blast
Man, this Bucks-Celtics series is a hell of a lot of fun. Game 1 was a bonkers overtime affair that featured an insane glut of ballsy shot-making in the final minute of regulation. Games 2 and 3 were mostly wipeouts, but Sunday’s Game 4 had another incredible fourth quarter that came right down to t...
Scrappy Matthew Dellavedova Beats The Buzzer With Maximum Scrappiness
Khris Middleton used a lovely up-and-under move to create a bucket out of Milwaukee’s last full possession of the first quarter of Sunday’s Game 4 between the Bucks and the Boston Celtics. Middleton’s basket left just 1.2 seconds on the clock—not really enough for the Celtics to generate much of a p...
The Punishment For Pitching A No-Hitter Must Be Swift And Severe
A’s pitcher Sean Manaea no-hit the Boston Red Sox Saturday evening. It was Manaea’s third win in five starts, and Oakland’s fifth win in six games. Manaea had some help on the no-hit part from the umps and the scorekeeper, but the gem was a gem even if you happened to think Sandy Leon’s bloop to sha...
Jay Feely Shares, Regrets Sharing Photo Of Him Intimidating Daughter's Prom Date With A Gun
The joke at the heart of this prom photo is an old and basically harmless one—a father saying listen, young man, if you step out of line with my daughter tonight I will do you great harm is the setup of the best scene in Spider-Man: Homecoming and countless sitcom episodes—but someone should’ve poli...
Matt "I'm A Starting Pitcher" Harvey No Longer A Starting Pitcher
Mets manager Mickey Callaway announced Saturday that Matt Harvey will be moved to the bullpen following a rough outing Thursday night and a generally uneven start to the 2018 season. The writing was on the wall Thursday, when Callaway said he couldn’t commit to giving Harvey another turn in the rota...
Grim And Gritty Ricky Rubio Has The Thunder On The Ropes
It can be a little disorienting to remind yourself that grim and gritty Ricky Rubio, the veteran point guard of the Utah Jazz, has played exactly the same number of playoff games over the course of his NBA career as Donovan Mitchell has. Rubio, whose transformation from doe-eyed, baby-faced sidekick...
Deadspin Up All Night: Accarezzame
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Friggin’ John Sterling got me stuck on Italian songs....