patrickredford Page 139 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Shit-Talking German Track Cyclist Loses Seat During Sprint, Wins Gold Medal Anyway
British track cyclists have thus far dominated the velodrome at the Rio Olympics. They have 11 medals, while no other country has more than two. The women’s sprint gold medal was one of the few that got away, as Germany’s Kristina Vogel defeated Rebecca James this afternoon to take the win....
Haitian Hurdler Just Forgets To Jump Over His Hurdle, Apparently
Jeffrey Julmis of Haiti must have thought he was in the plain old vanilla 100m race instead of the 110m hurdles this afternoon. While approaching the first hurdle in the race, Julmis offered a meager hop, and ended up tangled up in it on the deck. ...
Don't Flip Your Bat At The Umpire, Man
Should you flip your bat after drawing a walk? Who knows, probably not. Should you flip your bat up, over, and onto the plate umpire’s head?...
Don't Try To Surprise Adrian Beltre With A Beverage Shower Or He'll Fight You With A Broom
If you try to touch Adrian Beltre’s head, he’ll flip out. If you try to douse him in one or more jugs of celebratory post-game beverage, he’ll mount up, grab weapons, and ward you off with them....
Malaysian Diver Executes Flawless Belly Flop
In the prelims of the men’s 3m springboard, Ahmad Amsyar Azman tried to do a dive that, presumably, was not meant to end in a belly flop. Despite his best efforts, it ended in a belly flop....
Shaunae Miller Beats Allyson Felix In The 400m Final With A Last-Gasp Dive Across The Line
Allyson Felix lost the 400-meter final by just seven agonizing hundredths of a second, after Bahamanian runner Shaunae Miller dove right at the finish line to hold off Felix’s charge from behind. The 30-year-old Felix came into the final stretch well behind Miller, but managed to almost run her down...
The Lions Don't Care About Their Own Zero Tolerance Policy
This afternoon, the Detroit Lions signed tight end Andrew Quarless. Quarless, who played for the Packers for five seasons, will be suspended for the first two games of the 2016 NFL season from a July 2015 altercation where he shot his gun during an altercation outside of a Miami nightclub....
Rams Fans Welcome The NFL Back To L.A. With Wild Brawl In The Stands
Last night, the freshly-relocated Los Angeles Rams played their first home game in the L.A. Coliseum since 1979, and they commemorated the occasion with a win. In the stands, some of their fans celebrated professional football’s return to L.A. with a fairly vicious brawl....
Out-Of-Control Garbage Fire Reportedly Sets Olympic Mountain Bike Course Ablaze<em></em>
Mountain biking at the Rio Olympics doesn’t start until this Saturday, but the event is already running into problems. Specifically, the course is on fire....
If You're A Small, Rich Country, You Can Buy An Olympic Medal<em></em>
After Ruth Jebet won the 3000-meter steeplechase yesterday, she stood on the top step above fellow Kenya native Hyvin Jepkemoi, received her gold medal from another Kenyan, Paul Tergat, then turned to watch the Bahraini flag ascend to the top of the flagpole. The 19-year-old Jebet was born in Kenya,...
Nick Diaz Argues With Drug Tester, Invites Her To Smoke Weed With Him
Exemplar of human possibility Nick Diaz hasn’t been back from his 18-month suspension long, but he’s already reprised his role as UFC shit-stirrer supreme. ESPN had him on right after his suspension was lifted, and he immediately disparaged any and all of his welterweight and middleweight competitor...
High-Speed Track Cycling Crash Takes Out Three Riders, Hospitalizes One
Track cycling crashes are ugly. Riders can reach over 40 MPH on their sprints, and falling at that speed can often leave you with skin burns, which half of the Australian team suffered when they crashed a week ago....
Watch Your Head
After bouncing around the minors for a while, Canadian pitcher Scott Richmond is plying his craft in the Chinese Professional Baseball League with the EDA Rhinos. Whether through sublime reflexes or blind luck, Richmond managed to turn one of the slickest and fastest double plays you’ll see all year...
Dutch Cyclist Rides Fully Horizontal On Wall To Avoid Crash
Keirin is a track cycling event where racers start behind a motorized pace vehicle, then more or less sprint it out for two kilometers. During the final lap of heat two at the women’s keirin this morning, French rider Virginie Cueff tried to budge her way into the outside lane so she could try and s...
All Aboard The Bear Train
Choo choo, follow the leader....
All The Senior Week Blogs You Want Me To Blog, Blogged
Earlier this afternoon, I solicited pitches for blogs that you wanted me to write....
Table Tennis Is Impossible To Play Without Pulling Insane Faces, Apparently
Like I said, look at these faces....
Simone Biles Just Put A Historic Whooping On The Women's Gymnastics Field<em></em>
Simone Biles, American hero, finished her dominant victory in the women’s all-around gymnastics competition with a 15.933 in the floor routine. She ended up 2.1 points clear of silver medalist Aly Raisman, which is higher than the combined margins of victory from every all-around competition from 19...
Kenyan Track Coach Reportedly Posed As Runner To Give A Fake Urine Sample To Doping Control
Earlier this week, Kenyan Athletics’ Michael Rotich was detained by Kenyan police on accusations that he was soliciting bribes from coaches in exchange for warning them about approaching doping tests. This afternoon, Kenya’s Citizen TV reported that track coach John Anzrah was caught posing as an at...
Ashley Feinberg Is Gawker Media's Thirstiest Blogger
We here at Gawker Media are in the business of telling the truth, but we’re also in the business of collaboration. You’ve probably noticed posts from across the Gawker network appearing here on Deadspin, and you’ve probably seen our posts appear on our sister sites. Splicing blogs from site to site ...