rick-chandler-old Page 105 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Law Finally Catches Up With The Cruzin Cooler
You may think that this is a free nation; where a man can enjoy a full day of holiday drinking and then drive home peacefully on his motorized cooler without being harrassed by the authorities. But you'd be wrong. A Whitehall, N.Y. man found that out on Memorial Day when he was pulled over while dri...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Call The Kids, It's Another Profanity-Laced Tirade!
Ah, to return to the halcyon days of March 31, when the Mariners were 1-0 and all was right with the world. But today they're 18 games below .500, having lost four straight and 12 of their past 15. The latest, a 4-3 5-4 loss to the Angels, prompted manager John McLaren to spew some choice profanitie...

About Last Night
What you missed while trashing your workplace because they took your red stapler ... • NHL: Heart like a wheel ... Wings win Stanley Cup! For Christ's sake, don't drop it! • MLB: Paul Konerko ends our suffering, White Sox beat Royals in 15. • NBA: Suns down to four coaching candidates. Hey, where's ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch on your first night off from campaigning since January ... • Boxing: Light heavyweights, Yusef Mack vs. Daniel Judah, at New York (10:30 p.m., ET). Same-day tape ... do not reveal the ending! [ESPN2] • MLB: Tampa Bay at Boston (7 p.m., ET). A battle for the very soul of the East Divisi...

Jesus Saves, But Still Takes His Usual 15 Percent
You may know that outfielder Josh Hamilton's negotiations of a long-term contract with the Texas Rangers hit a snag recently when he suddenly changed agents; going from Matt Sosnick of Sosnick Cobbe Sports to Michael Moye of Moye Associaties. The reason? Hamilton is a born-again Christian, and "want...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Packers Running Back Puts Burglar On IR
Confronted with a gang of burglars in his home, Green Bay Packers' running back Noah Herron did the obvious thing: He unscrewed a bedpost and knocked one of the them the hell out, and chased the others off the premises. That's exactly what I would have done, if you substitute "unscrewed a bedpost" ...

The Joy And Despair Of Two New York Pitching Debuts
So as we check in this morning on the great city and state of New York, we see much wailing and gnashing of teeth over the daring Joba-Chamberlain-as-a-starter experiment (he flew too close to the sun on mashed potato wings), and great rejoicing over the return of Pedro Martinez. Joba lasted just 2...

About Last Night
What you missed when the police took the plasma TV from your prison cell ... • MLB: The Radhames Liz Era has begun. Orioles 5, Twins 3. • NHL: Red Wings' explanation for Game 5 loss to Penguins: It was the refs' fault, of course. • Womens softball: How could you pitch to Kaitlin Cochran? Fools! Ariz...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after meeting a black guy ... • College Softball: Women's College World Series, at Oklahoma City, Championship Series, Game 2, Texas A&M vs. Arizona State (8 p.m., ET). The only game in town, at least until the Sonics arrive. [ESPN2] • WNBA: Washington Mystics at Phoenix Mercury (10:30...

China Is Several Varieties Of Crazy
Sorry, but your idea of sticking 2008 needles into your head and upper body in honor of the Beijing Olympics has already been done. My question for this guy: How do you sleep? Do you take 'em all out, and then re-stick yourself in the morning? (Not shown: The 2009 needles he applied to his crotch an...

Kansas City Gripped By Quincy Carter Fever
He's not exactly back in the NFL, but the Kansas City Brigade of the Arena Football League is a start. And believe it or not, that's a step up for the former Dallas Cowboys quartertback Quincy Carter, who was last seen playing for the Bossier-Shreveport BattleWings of the af2. After joining the Brig...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Chase Utley Is The Most Interesting Man In The World
Chase Utley is lighter than air, can charm the birds out of the trees and never forgets your birthday. His blood smells like cologne. He also makes diving, backhanded catches, has hit 21 home runs, will run into the catcher full tilt and is not opposed to bunting his way on base. On Monday, his hero...


What Can You Say Here Except, "Holy Crap"
The truce between cars and bicycles is an uneasy one at best, and is surely broken from time to time; but never more horrifically than seen here. And you are excused for that coffee spit-take. It happened outside of Monterrey, Mexico, near the U.S. border, on Sunday when a drunk driver apparently ...

About Last Night
What you missed while selling your camel ... • NHL: Penguin fans rejoice ... triple overtime win sends Stanley Cup Finals to Game 6. • NFL: T.O.'s three-year extension with Cowboys is worth $27 million (Super Bowl ring sold separately). • MLB: Cubs' Zambrano puts on a show, postpones June Swoon at l...