tcraggs22 Page 71 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Night's Winner: JaMarcus Russell's Adipose Tissue
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the 300-some pounds JaMarcus Russell was said to be carrying, and which the newly released quarterback will now be carrying out of Oakland....

The Freak-Out Over LeBron's Elbow Begins Now
Ball in Europe, citing a source close to the Cavs: "Apparently, the damage is enough that the right arm of King James ... is having great difficulty in carrying anything heavier than a basketball." The hopes of a city, for instance. [BallinEurope.com]...

Last Night's Winner: The Dogged Efforts To Prove Dez Bryant's Mom Is A Sinner
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Karacter Kops determined to prove that the mother of a newly minted professional football player is, while not a hooker, still a very bad person....

Peter King Forswears All Brett Favre Predictions, Immediately Makes Brett Favre Prediction
Here's Peter King, instantly forgetting what he thought he thought: "I'm finished predicting what he'll do, because I've been wrong every time I've predicted recently. And if I had to go to Vegas ... I'd bet he plays this fall." [MMQB, KSK]...

Later, Roy Williams Told A Masseuse That The Gulf Oil Catastrophe Was Nothing Compared To His Sunburn
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Study Of Most Loved, Loathed Baseball Teams On Internet Fails To Account For Actual Internet
Remember that totally, rigorously, kite-flyingly super-scientific Nielsen Co. study of the most loved and hated teams in baseball, according to the internet? The one that concluded that everyone loves the Giants and hates the Indians? Yeah, one problem:...

Private Stache: A New Feature In Which We Revisit The Unintentionally Hilarious Sports Photography Of Yore
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

The Commodification Of Tiger Woods's Whoring Continues Apace
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Drew Brees, <em>Times-Picayune</em> Leave The Yard In Entirely Different Ways
"A packed house at Zephyr Field learned two things Wednesday night. One, that child sexual abuse is a big problem, and two, that New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees can smack home runs from either side of the plate." [Times-Picayune; related]...

Last Night's Winner: Les Habitants (Of Their Mothers' Basements)
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Poindexters and figure filberts who knew all along that the roundly dismissed Canadiens were dangerous....

Dumb Honky Radio Guy Fired For Doing On Twitter What Everyone In Sports Talk Does On Air
Bacsik, the former Nats reliever and leading demographer of the American Southwest, has been fired by KTCK-AM's parent company for all that "dirty Mexicans" business on Twitter the other day. Because sports-talk radio is no place for casual racism and half-drunk stupidity....

Last Night's Winner: LeElbow
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the hinge joint in LeBron James's right arm, which exploded into a thousand pieces yesterday, filling the Cleveland sky with bright constellations of bone dust and shard....

Athlete Wives Are Just Regular Gals, <em>Washington Post</em> Keeps Reporting
The Post gives the wives of the Capitals the same incisive treatment it gave the wives of the Nationals last year. Noted: "They're striking, yes! But, in a regular kind of way." [Washington Post]...

Joe Biden Mourns The 29 Dead West Virginia Miners By Somberly Crapping On Rich Rodriguez
Here's our walking facepalm of a vice president, speaking at a memorial for the dead miners: "They loved hunting, fishing, riding horses and four-wheelers. They hated the way Coach Rodriguez left West Virginia for Michigan." [TNR]...

Last Night's Winner: People Who Question Dwight Howard's Manhood
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the folks who mistake human beings for sled dogs and accuse Dwight Howard of not being alpha enough....

Dumb Honky Apologizes For That "Dirty Mexicans" Stuff (UPDATE)
Earlier, we mentioned former reliever Mike Bacsik's Twitter meltdown, in which he congratulated the "dirty mexicans" of San Antonio on the Spurs' victory yesterday. Here's the apology. Can u forgive him? UPDATE: Bacsik apologizes to his radio station and Jesus, too....

Apple Thinks This Tiger Woods Cartoon Is Too Mean For Your iPhone
Cartoonist Daryl Cagle says Apple rejected his Tiger Woods editorial cartoons app on the grounds that it "ridicules" a public figure, which seems like an awfully strong stance against something that amounts to a Leno monologue in pen and ink....

Tim Tebow And The Broncos: A Match Made In Metaphorical Heaven
Tebow, describing either the orgy scene in Caligula or his first meeting with Josh McDaniels: "There was passion. It was just intense, and it was ball, and it was juice. The juice level in that room was high, and it was awesome."...

Manny Ramirez Heroically Shops For Discount Electronics On Injured Calf
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

Suddenly, Everyone's Saying Mean Things About Bryce Harper
Kevin Goldstein talked to some baseball-types about Chosen Person Bryce Harper, and good lord do they sound like a couple high school girls passing around a slam book....