tom-ley Page 216 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
We'll Pay You To Read The Tampa Bay Bucs' Longform Advertorial
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers have put something terrible on the internet, a 32,000-word piece of what we can only assume is advertorial content presented as the kind of #longform journalism that is meant to get Serious Readers stiff. ...
That Cool <em>NYT</em> LeBron Cover Was (Sort Of) Inspired By Kanye And Kim
After LeBron James announced that he was returning to Cleveland, The New York Times ran one of the coolest covers we've ever seen on its Saturday sports section. It turns out that the idea behind the cover was indirectly inspired by Kanye West and Kim Kardashian, because of course it was....
The Astros Are Trying To Dick Draft Picks Out Of Their Money
The Astros selected high school pitcher Brady Aiken with the first overall pick in this year's amateur draft, and quickly came to a verbal agreement that would pay Aiken a $6.5 million bonus, a notch down from the $7.9 million slot value that was assigned the No. 1 pick. But now the Astros are tryin...
Germany's World Cup Victory Ceremony Was Really Something
American championship parades may feature unexpected swearing and goofy-ass dancing from time to time, but we really don't have shit on the Germans. When they celebrate a championship, they pull out all the stops....
Here Is The Worst Lede About Chicago Gun Violence. We Tried To Top It.
Cal Thomas, a syndicated columnist who is employed by Tribune Media, recently wrote about the ongoing gun violence in Chicago. This is how the article begins, complete with typo:...
Browns Owner Avoids Federal Prosecution With Massive Settlement
Browns owner Jimmy Haslam, who is the CEO of a truck stop empire that committed a whole bunch of fraud, probably won't be spending any time in prison for presiding over a company that bilked customers out of tens of millions of dollars. That's because his company, Pilot Flying J, just agreed to pay ...
Here's The New College Football Playoff Trophy
Huh. It's got a certain Georgia O'Keeffe vibe to it....
Rihanna Partied With The German National Team Last Night
Rihanna was on the scene in Brazil for last night's final between Germany and Argentina. Because she's Rihanna, she also got to stick around and party with the Germans after their victory....
Hey, Check Out Mario Götze's Boat Boner
Hey, casual soccer fan! You're likely going to remember Mario Götze as the guy who won the 2014 World Cup for Germany, but you should know that he was famous long before he scored last night's deciding goal. That's because he once got a big ol' boner while hanging out on a boat with a lady....
Don't Do This To Yourself, Cleveland
No. Don't do this. You're going to jinx it....
Kevin Kiermaier Hit A Liner Straight Through Eric Hosmer's Glove
I have no idea who Kevin Kiermaier is, but he hit a baseball harder than shit last night. He hit it so hard that it went straight through Eric Hosmer's damn glove....
Other Plan B's For The Cleveland Cavaliers To Consider
By trading Jarrett Jack in order to clear cap space today, the Cavs made it clear they're all-in on trying to get LeBron James. It's also being reported that if they miss out on James, their Plan B involves trying to sign Chandler Parsons or Trevor Ariza. Those are pretty sad plans! Here are some ...
Alleged Murderer Has Cardinals And White Sox Logos Among His Face Tats
This Chicago man has been arrested and charged with murder after allegedly shooting and killing a man over the 4th of July weekend. Aside from being the kind of guy who allegedly shoots people and gets "Fuck The World" tattooed on his forehead, he also appears to be a fan of both the St. Louis Cardi...
The Cavs Just Cleared Some LeBron-Sized Cap Space
So it appears that the Cavs are really going for it. LeBron's old team just swung a three-team trade that will clear $9.5 million off the Cavaliers' books, leaving them with about $24 million in cap space, and that puts them them well in position to offer LeBron a max contract at $20.7 million....
Today's Brazilian Newspaper Covers Are Pure Sadness
If there's one thing to be thankful for in the wake of Brazil's World Cup meltdown, it's that the host country's stunning 7-1 defeat gave Brazilian newspaper editors a chance to cut loose and really go all-in with the despair. With that in mind, let's survey (via Newseum) today's best, saddest Bra...
First Pitch From Taiwanese Baseball Game Is Weird As Hell
What the hell?...
Brazil's Meltdown Was Too Sad For The World-Cup-Logo-As-Facepalm Meme
The "World Cup logo as a sad, facepalming guy" meme has been around since the start of the tournament. When Brazil was down 5-0 to Germany, it looked like this version, via @dorybenami, would end up being the perfection of the meme. And then Brazil went ahead and conceded two more goals. So much for...
Tony Wroten Nearly Flees From His Own Incredible Shammgod Crossover
Tony Wroten's Shammgod crossover is spectacular, but what we are really here to admire is how damn excited Wroten is about his Shammgod crossover....
Bronson Arroyo Was About As Pretty OK, I Guess, As Anyone Ever
Arizona Diamondbacks pitcher Bronson Arroyo announced on Monday that he will be undergoing Tommy John surgery to repair the torn ulnar collateral ligament in his right elbow. The news that a 37-year-old pitcher who has never really warranted a descriptor any more generous than "OK" is out for the fo...