weed-against-speed-old Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Clippers Broadcasters Suspended For Mispronouncing 'Iranian'
Play-by-play man Ralph Lawler and analyst Mike Smith have been suspended for one game for calling Grizzlies center Hamed Haddadi an "EYE-ranian." The Iron Sheik would probably like to take these guys on in a cage match. [Los Angeles Times]...

Poon For Everybody!
Missouri fans who made the trip to Manhattan, Kansas to watch their Tigers trash Kansas State 38-12 decided to honor the team's victory by holding up letters to spell out "POON." Although I'm a bit confused by the extraneous "O."...

Stephon Marbury Continues To Turn Craziness Into An Art Form
I'm no genius, but it seems to me that Marbury isn't a huge fan of Knicks coach Mike D'Antoni. In a tweet one would suspect were the rantings of a clinically insane individual, Marbury calls the coach "DPHONY." Nice. [SimonOnSports]...

Timberwolves GM Wants Fans To Know He Is Aware Of How Much Team Sucks
Mired in a nine-game slide, the Timberwolves are struggling to get acclimated to Kurt Rambis' triangle offense. Further, the team stinks. So, GM David Kahn did the only sensible thing - he wrote a letter to the team's 10 fans....

This Guy Is Trying To Steal John Daly's Bit
And no, I'm not referring to Udorn Duangdecha getting his stomach stapled and surviving solely on Diet Coke and cigarettes - check out those slacks. Crap, they're so loud that Marlee Matlin heard him trying them on. [Devil Ball Golf]...

Your Late Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
It's time for the second round of games on this wonderful Saturday afternoon. There's plenty of options on the telly, with Florida at South Carolina as perhaps the most intriguing. Can you imagine how excited these girls are right now?...

Joe Torre Is Happy For The Yankees - No, Really
Given his acrimonious exit as Yankees manager, one would suspect that Joe Torre would be a bit bitter about the Yankees winning the World Series. Nope. Not at all. In fact, he's as pleased as punch - or something....

I Bet The Graphics Guy Who Cropped Indiana's Logo This Way Feels Like A Boob
Heh. Tit. And for those of you worried about this warping our young people, it has already been changed to a less-offensive image. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to make "BOOBLESS" appear on my calculator. (Thanks, reader Josh)...

CFL Player Gets Stabbed After Attending KISS Concert (Updated)
Calgary Stampeders tight end Teyo Johnson got stabbed at a party Thursday night after he went to a KISS concert. Apparently, it has been learned that it was a DJ Tiesto concert - not KISS. Same difference, right? [TSN]...

It's Too Bad The Title 'Psycho' Was Already Taken
So, Ron Artest is making a movie about his life. That's...um, interesting....

To Be Fair, Jesus Was Fiercely Anti-Merkin
Okay, one more Jesus-related post today. In anticipation of College Gameday's appearance in Fort Worth today for the TCU-Utah tilt, one clever TCU fan decided to make it known Lee Corso's long-running feud with the King of Kings. [myFOXdfw]...

Your Early Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
You got Tennessee-Ole Miss on CBS. Go forth and watch collegiate football. Drink beer if you wish. Try to avoid getting arrested....

Chad Ochocinco Fined Veinte Mil Dólares By Liga Nacional de Fútbol Americano
¡Ay, caramba! Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver/prop comic Chad Ochocinco has been fined $20,000 by the NFL for jokingly attempting to bribe an official with a dollar bill during last Sunday's game against the Baltimore Ravens....

Rick Nash Is A Fancy Boy
I haven't seen a hockey player make a move this fabulous since D.B. Sweeney's one-footed salchow in The Cutting Edge....

That's Nice And All, But I Heard Jesus Hates Them
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

I Believe This Sums Up The Average Notre Dame Fan's Thoughts Quite Nicely
So, uh, Notre Dame lost to Navy today 23-21. The last time an unranked Navy team beat a ranked Notre Dame squad was 1936. The last time Navy beat the Fighting Irish twice in a row was 1961 and 1963....

So, The University Of Arizona Had An Undie Run...
Undie Runs on our nation's university campuses are occurring more and more often. That doesn't mean I'm not going to do a post about it. What do you mean this isn't about sports? There's sports at the University of Arizona....

Who Else Thinks This Guy's Favorite Cartoon Is 'Pinky And The Brain'?
If this guy were a shoplifter, would he refer to what he does as using the "four finger discount"? Seriously, I got nothing. Commenters, do your thing. [H/T DS reader Joe, many others]...

I Bet Rich Rodriguez Could Sure Use A Couple Of Boilermakers Right About Now
Michigan lost to Purdue 38-36 at the Big House, the first time to Purdue since 1966. The Wolverines have now lost three straight and five consecutive Big Ten games. Even worse? Rich Rod got punked at midfield after the game....

Finally, Kobe Bryant Accomplishes Something
By scoring 41 points last night, Bryant became the youngest player ever to reach 24,000 points. The commenter who best incorporates this into an anal sex joke gets a +1 or whatever is behind Door No. 3. [USA Today]...