Baseball Page 1312 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The End Of The Rocky Road For Clint Hurdle
Sources say! Clint Hurdle will be fired after seven years (really?) as Colorado's manager and just a little over one season removed from the team's World Series appearance. Does anyone have a John Denver CD I can borrow? [Denver Post]...

Excuse Me, Ma'am, The Yankees Do Not Suck
With the Yankees in town, a Texas woman proudly sported her anniversary present: a "Yankees Suck" T-shirt. That's against the law in Rangersland. It's considered profane. So she had to turn her shirt inside-out. But in her defense, the Rangers did let A-Rod in the stadium. [Dallas Morning News, NBC]...

Why Rick Porcello Matters
Rick Porcello won his fifth straight start yesterday, which ensured the 20-year-old a long season of being inaptly compared to Doc Gooden. He'll probably finish the year reminding everyone of Zach Duke instead, but there's a reason to hope he doesn't, and it has to do with the amateur draft....

Voting For Manny Probably Won't Matter
Who said social activism was dead? We're living in the Age of Obama, which means everyone is all jazzed about public service, and there's no better way to voice your displeasure with the bureaucracy of Major League Baseball than to... vote Manny Ramirez into the All-Star game!...

Accused Killer Indicted In Adenhart Case
"A grand jury has indicted the man accused of killing Los Angeles Angels pitcher Nick Adenhart and two others when a minivan smashed into their car last month. Orange County prosecutors say Andrew Gallo was indicted on three counts of murder and three other felonies for the April crash." [AP]...

No Gatorade Machine Is Safe From Zambrano's Wrath
Carlos Zambrano did not make it through his start against the Pirates today and neither did the Gatorade dispenser in the Cubs dugout. Carlos gets ejected, but it's always the electrolytes that have to pay the price....

Savior Of Baltimore, Fantasy Teams Everywhere To Debut Friday
Matt Wieters, who is evidently a real player and not just some sad phantom haunting Yahoo fantasy rosters, will make his major league debut for Baltimore on Friday against the Tigers. "It's time," said Orioles president of baseball operations Andy MacPhail. Adjust your rosters accordingly. [Baltimor...

The Evil Umpire: Who Once Called Pitches For Randy Johnson?
Tom Verducci wrote up Randy Johnson in last week's Sports Illustrated and included this odd — and oddly unnoticed — anecdote:...

Carlos Marmol Leaves Team To Be With Wife (Not Pictured: His Wife)
Cub reliever Carlos Marmol is taking a leave of absence from his day job to fly to New York, as his wife is scheduled to give birth there this week. So then who was the very non-pregnant "female companion" he was snuggling with two weeks ago?...

All Big East Baseball Games Now Decided By Dance Off
Connecticut and South Florida squared off in a classic Big East baseball tilt—or they tried to before a five-hour rain delay. So how do you kill time during the one thing more boring than Big East baseball? Simple: Worst community theater production of "West Side Story" ever....

Inside Edition Shocked To Find Drunk People At Baseball Game
In Milwaukee, of all places! "Fights break out inside the stadium, foul language can be heard in the stands, and there are obscene gestures everywhere," reports America's Newsmagazine. [Inside Edition]...

Jake Peavy Says "Thanks But No Thanks" To White Sox
Jake Peavy loves batting so much that he can't bear to leave the National League, so he decided to reject the trade that would have sent him to the Chicago White Sox. Also, he knows how to read a box score. [MLB]...

Royals Fans Turn Children's Playground Into Thunderdome
Two couples started an all-out brawl at a Kansas City Royals game on Sunday after a woman walked in front another woman as she was taking a picture, a breech of etiquette that clearly deserves a head stomping. If a few kids got hurt along the way, that's just business....

Holy Crap, David Ortiz Hit A Home Run
Light-hitting Boston infielder becomes the 320th major league player to hit a home run this season. It's okay to believe in America again, people. [Boston Herald]...

Wife Of Pitcher Scott Schoeneweis Found Dead
Gabrielle Dawn Schoeneweis, the wife of Arizona Diamondbacks reliever Scott Schoeneweis, was found unconscious in the family's home today and sheriff's deputies were unable to revive her when they arrived. No cause of death has been determined yet. She was 39. Terrible news. [Arizona Republic]...

Pirates Tour White House, For Some Reason; Skipper Pulls A Reverse Harrison
"Pirates' manager John Russell skipped the tour saying he'd rather visit when he has a World Series ring on his finger." [KDKA]...

Calling All Baseball Dorks! Bill James And Joe Posnanski, In Conversation!
They're talking about Randy Johnson, but does it really matter? I've written slash fiction about this very moment. [SI.com]...

Some Chick To Teach Other Broads About Man Things
The L.A. Dodgers will air a series of radio broadcasts aimed at women, particularly those who don't know much about baseball. Jeanne Zelasko will do play-by-play and talk real slow so that these dames can get the infield fly rule through their thick skulls....

Is The D-Train Back On Track?
Dontrelle Willis won a game yesterday. And his pitching was more than adequate! So has he finally got over his case of the Greinkes or is this just a momentary blip on the mine cart ride to oblivion?...

Mets Fan Swallowed By Citi Field Toilet
Oh, Mets fans! It feels like the whole world is out to get you, but honestly, you're kinda asking for it. When one of you goes diving into a baseball stadium toilet after a gold tooth and gets stuck ... we're all a little embarrassed for you....