MLB Page 1206 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Teagarden Affair Once Again Exposes All-Star Voters As A Bunch Of Morons
Here's your triannual reminder that sports fans are stupid, and should be protected from themselves: currently fourth in the voting for AL catcher is a player who has one measly hit on the season, and currently plays in Double-A....

Remembering The Ill-Fated Yankees Mascot
"Dandy" survived only three seasons, thanks in part to being banned from the field by George Steinbrenner after Lou Piniella's run-in with the San Diego Chicken. And also, because he was a hideous abomination and an affront to sanity. [WSJ]...

Earthquake Interrupts Padres Game
A 5.7 earthquake struck during the eighth inning of last night's San Diego/Toronto tilt. Guess God isn't a fan of interleague play....

Ozzie Guillen, GM, "Almost Come To Blows"
The White Sox front office has been upgraded to DEFCON 2, after Guillen and Ken Williams nearly threw down during the MLB draft. The catalyst? The Sox waiting until the 22nd round to take Guillen's son....

The Dodgers Hired A Wizard, For Six Figures, To Send Good Vibes
Frank and Jamie McCourt, those feudin' and fussin' co-owners and estranged spouses, spent good money — really good money — on an elderly man who sat at home in Boston, watched Dodgers games on TV, and sent positive energy....

Your Marco Scutaro Summer Jam Is Here
"Scuscuscutaro" has dropped and, as far as Phil Collins song parodies about journeymen shortstops go, it's excellent — streets ahead of that Pavement album about Jeff Hornacek. H/T BullfightsOnAcid....

Did MLB Network Predict Josh Willingham's Home Run?
Yes, he's the real deal and we'll have more on that later, but did anybody else notice this goof-up/incredible called shot from the boys in the truck?...

This Is Pete Rose's Corked Bat
You’re looking at an X-ray of a Mizuno PR4192 bat, commissioned by Pete Rose specifically for his 1985 chase of baseball’s all-time hits record. Inside, clear as day, is a piece of foreign material, about 6 inches long, and the diameter of a nickel. This is the story of that bat....

Bryce Harper Completes Washington Nationals
High school dropout Bryce Harper and his dumb face paint are heading to Washington. Might as well start him tomorrow night and get it all over with. [Live draft updates @ MLB.com, Pic: AP]...

Survival Of The Fastest At Citi Field, As Man Robs Kid Of Foul Ball
We're finding it hard not to sympathize with the guy on this one, because we've never caught a ball of our own. Still, we're always up for a public shaming....

And Here's A Little Kid Drinking Beer At A Baseball Game
Extra innings on a brutally humid Philadelphia afternoon isn't easy to sit through. One tyke with a bright future discovered how Daddy makes it through the day, and why Daddy is mean to Mommy sometimes. [via The Fightins]...

Town Offers To Rename Itself "Stephen Strasburg"
Via Darren Rovell, the town of Strasburg, Va., will rename itself Stephen Strasburg, if he just makes a visit sometime this year. Hey, it put Hitler, North Dakota on the map. [RenameStrasburg.com]...

Mariners Celebrate Lolcats Night
Nothing like a 7-year-old Internet meme to show the kids you're hip, right Seattle? What's next, redirecting the team site to Last Measure? (Note: don't go to Last Measure.)...

Roger Clemens Is The One Guy Jose Canseco Won't Rat Out
Jose Canseco told a grand jury that he never saw Roger Clemens use steroids....and he sees everything. I forget if Canseco is the "lone honest human" or "embarrassment to humanity" this month. [Daily News]...

Unrelated Baseball Matter Leads To Casual Misogyny At CNBC
Perky CNBC anchor thinks it's nice that Joyce and Galarraga hugged and made up. Crusty CNBC anchor says "this is why women aren't in charge of sports." No, this is why CNBC shouldn't even talk about sports....

Bud Selig Speaks On Imperfect Game, Says Nothing
No overturning Jim Joyce's call, and no perfect game for Galarraga. But there's this: "Given last night's call and other recent events, I will examine our umpiring system, the expanded use of instant replay and all other related features." [MLB]...

Finally, Barry Bonds's Mug Shot
After much hemming and hawing, the feds released Bonds's mug shot from his 2007 arraignment on perjury and obstruction of justice charges. [The Smoking Gun]...

Perhaps The Most Fascinating "Imperfect Game" Reaction You'll See
A West Virginia man, dipping and wearing short shorts, watches the ninth inning of Armando Galarraga's masterpiece with his young children. Hilarity ensues....

Armando Galarraga Absolutely Robbed Of A Perfect Game By Umpire's Bad Call
Detroit's Armando Galarraga just threw the 21st perfect game in Major League history and the second one this week. Unfortunately, umpire Jim Joyce turned the 27th out into a infield hit with a horrendously botched call. (UPDATE: Joyce has apologized.)...

So We Come To The End Of Ken Griffey Jr.
The Mariners have finally informed Ken Griffey Jr. that he retired from baseball nine months ago. Your lamentations of lost youth just excused themselves to send a wistful email to your yearnings for childlike wonder. [ESPN]...