MLB Page 808 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Madman Theory Of The Montreal/Tampa Bay Rays
Any self-respecting student of insane Machiavellian gambits should be familiar with the Madman Theory, Richard Nixon’s self-invented strategy for winning the war in Vietnam. The theory, as recounted by Nixon chief of staff H.R. Haldeman after he got out of jail for his role in Watergate, went like t...

Jason Vargas Implies That We Do Not Know The Full Story Behind The Mets' Latest Metsing
Mets pitcher Jason Vargas had one of his best starts of the season last night, holding the Phillies to just three hits and two earned runs through 6.1 innings while striking out 10. The Mets still lost the game, of course, but Vargas’s strong start apparently left him feeling a bit sassy. In the loc...

Hey, Remember Giancarlo Stanton? Well, He's Gone Again
Just when the Yankees were starting to enjoy the return of slugger Giancarlo Stanton, just when he’d started to look like the middle-of-the-lineup force of old, just when the sight of him looming over the plate like a comic book monster started to lose its weird nostalgic charm, the universe has ste...

Miguel Cabrera's Decline Is Going To Be A Long And Sad Affair
I didn’t watch the Tigers lose 5-3 to the Rangers on Tuesday night—I was paying attention, instead, to the local baseball team that was actually trying to win. But a tweet from the Tigers’ broadcasters caught my eye in the middle of the Michigan-Vanderbilt game. I assumed, at first glance, that Migu...

Joey Votto Treats Heckler With The Appropriate Level Of Respect
By now, hecklers should know better than to mess with Reds first baseman Joey Votto. There are enough documented instances of him clowning opposing fans (and Cincinnati’s own) that the best strategy is to just let him be. One Angels fan at Tuesday night’s game chose not to do that, and although it’s...

The 2-Year-Old Who Was Hit By A Foul Ball At An Astros Game Suffered A Skull Fracture
On May 29, a two-year-old girl was struck by a foul ball during a game between the Cubs and Astros in Houston. In the first update about the child’s condition since then, an attorney representing her family revealed today that she suffered a fractured skull when she was struck by the ball....

Reds Allow Runner To Score From Second Base On Sac Fly Like Big Sleepy Idiots
It was an extremely unimpressive night for the Cincinnati Reds, who suffered a 5–1 loss against the Angels in Anaheim. They gave up their first run of the night on a leadoff inside-the-park dinger to Tommy La Stella, and they gave up the final run of the night when Wilfredo Tovar scored from second ...

Tommy La Stella's Blessed Season Continues With Leadoff Inside-The-Park Dinger
It is now late June, which means if you can’t at least feign excitement about a leadoff inside-the-park home run in an interleague baseball game, you are staring down a summer of relatively slim pickings, VAR-marred World Cup soccer notwithstanding. Please, before you reduce yourself to hunting for ...

The Cubs Fell Ass Backwards Into A Very Dumb Double Play
I don’t know why Javy Baez (or whoever’s giving him signals) would have so much faith that a pitcher making only his third plate appearance in the major leagues would be able to hold up his end of the suicide squeeze, but the overconfidence of Baez and the pure stupidity of Willson Contreras over on...

Marcus Stroman May As Well Have Worn A "Please Trade For Me!" Sign Into Yankee Stadium
Two things that we know for sure are that the New York Yankees are going to acquire some starting pitching before this year’s trade deadline, and that the Toronto Blue Jays are big-time ass. The Blue Jays are also in possession of 28-year-old starter Marcus Stroman, who, along with everyone else, s...

Who's Running The Mets?
Early Monday evening, the Knicks briefly wrested back the crown for the New York metropolitan area’s largest tire fire. Briefly. Because only a little later Monday evening, the Mets were in the news again. And when the Mets are in the news, it’s never, ever for anything good....

Public Service Announcement: Please Stop Interrupting Dodgers Games To Hug Cody Bellinger
In the bottom of the eighth inning Monday night in Arizona, a young woman ran from the stands and into right field, where she appeared to awkwardly hug Dodgers superstar Cody Bellinger. Needless to say, this ended with the young woman being arrested....

Mickey Callaway And Jason Vargas Are Sorry That Their Actions Distracted From The Mets' General Suckiness
The Mets Metsed a lot yesterday, and in response to that Metsing, they prepared some apologies today. Sadly, they Metsed those, too....

Cardinals Flamethrower Jordan Hicks Shredded His Pitching Elbow
In some MLB injury news that felt as sadly inevitable as it is disappointing, St. Louis Cardinals closer Jordan Hicks is likely out for the long-term future, as the team announced today that he tore the UCL in his right (throwing) elbow. The Cardinals said they are “determining the next course of ac...

The Mets Are Metsing At An Alarming Rate
The high point of the Mets’ existence on Sunday, and not inconceivably of their entire season, came when the team’s Twitter account attempted to dunk on ... well, on Mets fans. Specifically those who had reacted to the posting of the day’s relatively punchless lineup with horror and disgust and pres...

Mets' Jason Vargas To Reporter: "I'll Knock You The Fuck Out, Bro"
One day after I made the mistake of complimenting the Mets on this site, they’ve gone ahead and returned to the tire-fire form that most people have gotten used to seeing on a regular basis. Today’s Mets meltdown features manager Mickey Callaway and Jason Vargas getting into it with a reporter who w...

Adam Eaton: Actually, The Financial Struggles Of Minor League Players Are A Good Thing
Kelyn Soong of Washington City Paper recently covered the lives of a couple players on the Nationals’ Triple-A affiliate: the Potomac Nationals. The story focuses on the financial difficulties that minor league ball players face while trying to chase their dreams of making it in MLB. It’s a not-so-f...

The Nationals Have Finally Freed Themselves From The Curse Of Trevor Rosenthal
If you listen closely with your ear towards a swamp-like city near the mid-Atlantic, you’ll be able to hear the faint sounds of mild optimism returning to the minds and spirits of the dozens of Nationals fans in the DC-metro area. The reason for this is because of Washington finally getting rid of t...

Derek Dietrich Is Still Not Giving Up The Inside Corner
In the top of the fifth against the Brewers, Reds second baseman Derek Dietrich got hit in the elbow by a 71 mph changeup from Alex Claudio. It was the sixth time that a Brewers pitcher had hit Dietrich with a pitch in three games, setting an MLB record for most times a player has been hit in a seri...

Wilkin Castillo's First MLB Hit In Over A Decade Was A Go-Ahead RBI Double
For the first time in over 10 years, 35-year-old Wilkin Castillo got a hit in the majors, and it was a pretty sweet one at that. In the top of seventh with two outs against the Phillies, Castillo smoked an RBI double into right field that sent two runners home and gave the Marlins a lead they wouldn...