I’m fully aware that Bill Belichick has been dressing for decades now like he was raised by cavemen.
The NFL Network ran an ad referencing this in its first season (“That Belichick is a sharp dresser!”) back in 2004.
The flagrantly over-faded hoodies with cut sleeves has obviously become his staple, and he usually doesn’t venture too far from that dreary zone. However, when his appearance transforms from looking like a regular couch slouch to actually looking like he was attacked by raccoons on his way to work, then we have a problem.
And that’s exactly what happened today when the Patriots coach decided to pull up to his midweek press conference in an outfit that looked like it had been used in the Battle of Yorktown.
New England Quarterback Cam Newton joked Tuesday that if he played well enough, he would be able to dress Belichick and the coaching staff.
Well, Cam, it’s obvious that Belichick needs your assistance. He’s been terrible for so long but now he’s just completely gone off the deep end.
Maybe it was the quarantine that finally turned him this way or maybe this is just a 68-year-old Belichick giving up the last little ounce of care that he had in his appearance.
Why can’t he just go in the supply closet and pick out a fresh hoodie? Or just have an assistant do it for him?
Either way, it makes no sense for the multimillionaire to still be holding on to a hoodie that is so desperately asking to get put out of its misery.
I’ve been around the league too long to think that Belichick isn’t gonna Belichick.
But this, right here? This is a new level.