Bleacher Report Editors Demand Bleacher Report Writers Be Less Retarded

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If you are one of those unlucky sports fans who has to slog through Bleacher Report's Google-raping SEO "stories" when you do a general news search for a topic about an athlete, team, or topseventeensidelinereportersthechileancoalminersshouldhavesexwith, this is great news.

From an anonymous emailer:

I used to write regularly for Bleacher Report but have not in a couple of months. I received the following email from B/R regarding a change in its writer and editing policies (they are sending this out to a "significant percentage of writers"):

Changes to B/R Publishing Policies
Dear Writers,

People write for Bleacher Report to reach an audience, and as B/R's audience continues to grow, and we strive to keep our quality standards high, we are asking a significant percentage of writers to reapply to write for the site.


Your Bleacher Report profile, account and past articles are still intact, and you're still able to comment on stories and interact with fellow readers. But in order to continue writing, you'll need to send a writing sample, and a link to your B/R profile page to

As the site grows, we need to make sure the writers contributing to the site are providing clean and well-edited copy, high-quality analysis, and adding something new to the sports conversation. To be fair to the many writers at Bleacher Report, our quality standards must remain high.


We know this is an inconvenience, and if you feel your writer privileges have been removed mistakenly, don't hesitate to reapply to write for the site — your work should speak for itself.

Thanks for your cooperation,

The Bleacher Report Editorial Team

Nice job Team! Big, honking tray of pickles for you.