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Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Can Cristiano Ronaldo Dunk?

Illustration for article titled Can Cristiano Ronaldo Dunk?

So a couple hours ago, Cristiano Ronaldo—who is one of the greatest players in the history of the game of soccer because he is also one of the most physically dominant athletes of all time in any sport anywhere—posted a photo of himself dunking a soccer ball on a basketball hoop. My colleagues, a den of the most ornery and contrarian front-running troll motherfuckers in the history of the world wide web, had reservations about the veracity of this photo.

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An immediate question was whether the rim was at the regulation height of 10 feet. The cropping of the photo immediately invited skepticism, and this skepticism eventually devolved to our own news editor Tom Ley saying he will “give ronaldo $500 of my own money if he can dunk on a regulation rim.”

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Illustration for article titled Can Cristiano Ronaldo Dunk?

To disclose fully, everyone in the conversation was either a Very Bias fan of Barcelona over Ronaldo’s Real Madrid or a football- and/or baseball-loving soulless xenophobe, which is to say that they demanded proof that a well-groomed European soccer man had the requisite constitution to jump high in the air and place a ball through the hoop. So we looked for some photos. Here is one of Ronaldo eye-level with an eight-foot crossbar:

Illustration for article titled Can Cristiano Ronaldo Dunk?

Here is another, of Ronaldo nearly headbutting what appears to be a 10-foot field goal crossbar:

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But many of these mini-Cruzes weren’t satisfied until we watched this video, in which a robot argues quite persuasively that Cristiano Ronaldo can complete various feats that Christ could not.

Look at this shit:

Illustration for article titled Can Cristiano Ronaldo Dunk?
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Cristiano Ronaldo can dunk.

Photo Credit: Getty Images

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