Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

Colin Cowherd is a flaccid penis shaft of a man with a syphilitic soul who is paid handsomely by ESPN to spew racist and sexist and otherwise trash opinions over TV, radio, and the internet on a daily basis. That's why it was so surprising that when he talked about black people today, he was right! Kind of.


Cowherd was on his televised radio show today, fielding a call from a lady named Holly. They were talking about how Holly likes sports, though her friends don't, when Cowherd got turnt up and started assuring Holly that it's OK for her friends not to like sports. Then he hit us with the knowledge dart.

By the way, African-American men do not watch hockey. I have seen the numbers. I can tell you every sport who watches it. Even among men. Racial differences. Ethnicity differences. African-American men don't watch hockey. They do watch at a higher percentage basketball. It's OK. Neither is good, neither is bad. It's OK.

One person People got pissed. Friend of Deadspin Richard "Thirsty" Deitsch, in particular, took to the interwebs to lay out his grievances:


That's when like three or four black people began to tweet back at Deitsch, proclaiming their love for hockey.


There's this half-serious joke among black people that if, when attempting to speak respectfully about black people, you can only refer to them as African-American because calling them black feels awkward, you're probably racist. Now, Cowherd is definitely racist, but what is interesting is that in using African-American, Cowherd was being unwittingly accurate.

I've met and fostered relationships with a couple of Canadian blacks in my life, and both of them really, really love hockey. So, who knows? Maybe they're batting 1.000 up there.


But down here, nah. Save for a few exceptions, African-Americans don't watch hockey. I was introduced in college when I lived with a black dude. Anecdotally, I can comfortably say I watch more hockey than any other African-American I know. (I know a lot of black people.) I watch about 10 hours in the year, mostly during the playoffs, at a bar, during NBA commercial breaks. And I think hockey's a good sport!

Statistically, blacks only make up three percent of the NHL's TV audience. To compare, only two percent of NASCAR's audience is made of blacks. NASCAR is inarguably white as fuck. You get the point.


Cowherd, however, said it's OK that only three percent of African-Americans watch hockey, which, clearly, is not OK. Hockey is a kind of fun sport to watch and play, and when given the opportunity, blacks can grow to both enjoy watching and excel at playing it. But hockey is a lot like lacrosse, or, say, NASCAR, or even like youth soccer, in that there are very obvious race and class reasons why few blacks ever feel like the sport is for them. It's not, and it's not designed to be.


That's another conversation. Pointing out that black dudes do not actually watch hockey? That's fine. Good job, Cowherd. You're still a fleshy fuckstick.

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