Comedian Says Lance Armstrong Asked Her To Eat His Butt

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Comedian April Macie is a frequent guest on the Howard Stern Show, and on Monday morning she joined Stern to dish some gossip about disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong. Specifically, she told Stern that Armstrong once asked her to lick his butt in a hotel bathroom.

Macie said that she and a friend enjoyed a night out in Los Angeles with Armstrong "five or six years ago," and eventually returned to his hotel room. That's when things allegedly got weird:

I went to use the bathroom, and I went in and Lance was bent over a bathtub and [my friend] was just face deep in his asshole


I was terrified. And then he came out and said, "Does your friend want in on a round too?" and I was like, "Of taint tickling? I’m gonna take a pass"


I think it’s hilarious that he would ask without even knowing my first name—to eat his asshole. Like, "Do you want in on a round too? Of asshole eating?"

Good luck getting that image out of your head. Now, feel free to take this story with a giant grain of salt, as it's entirely possible that it never happened and Macie is just making shit up. I mean, if a guy is getting his butthole eaten in a hotel bathroom, wouldn't he lock the door? You can listen to Macie tell the story for yourself here (fast-forward to the 19-minute mark).