Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Dad! Get Off The Court!

Illustration for article titled Dad! Get Off The Court!

Pop that sweatshirt: Sir, would you kindly return to your seat? I don't believe the Ohio Valley Champions need any tax help right now. [I Dislike Your Favorite Team]

This connects to what?!: Don't worry, this skeleton will explain everything you need to know about A-Rod's hip. No, that's not Pedro Gomez. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

What could go right?: How can Buffalo fans not be excited by the Terrell Owens deal? A colossal meltdown might actually make the team interesting for once. [Icy-Hot Sensations]

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Hooked on phonics: Some Alabama athletes are in trouble for using their scholarship money to buy other kids free textbooks. Hey, at least they are reading. [Slow Breaker]

He does like to ski: A downhill skier tested positive for cocaine at the world championships, but says he couldn't possibly have done coke the night before—because he was too drunk. [Steroid Nation]

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