Dallas Stars pull the ultimate dog-whistle #PleaseLikeMySport, fragile white people

Stand and salute or you’re a goshdang commie, so sayeth the Dallas Stars.
Stand and salute or you’re a goshdang commie, so sayeth the Dallas Stars.
Image: Getty Images

It didn’t take tarot cards and an 800-number to figure out where the Mavericks/anthem debate was going to go. And never let it be said that the NHL and hockey in general would miss a chance to try and show just how traditional and loyal they are, while actually showing exactly what they really are. Dallas Stars, come on down!


Did anyone ask for this? Nope. Was anyone sitting around the Metroplex thinking, “Boy, I wonder what the Stars think of their roommates not playing the anthem in front of basically no one?” Certainly not. But like any ignorant and yet arrogantly assured assclown who enters a debate that didn’t involve him (always a him), they’re going to tell you what they think and are damn sure you want to hear it.

Again, you don’t need a cipher to figure out what the Stars are doing here. This is every bit of a dog-whistle and almost at an infomercial level of one. This is a rush to try and turn the heads of anyone upset by the Mavs skipping the anthem, and you know exactly who that is. Anyone who gets really angry about the flag “not being respected” looks the same, and that’s clearly whom the Stars think is their target audience. Again, this is hockey, and it’s shown no urge to try and grow their fanbase beyond those who struggle to make toast (fuck, some of them even coach in the league!).

Let’s not underestimate the Texas-wrapping of themselves either, as if being the only NHL team in Texas had anything to do with anything. But hey, if you’re going whole “These Colors Don’t Run!” you might as well keep going and give the horns-sign and break a bottle of Lone Star over your head before eating the shards.

Now, this is an NHL team, and we have to allow for the possibility that this was somehow unintentional and just a complete missing of their mark by a football field or two. This is a league filled with teams capable of that kind of dumbassery. But this one seems a little too pointed, a little too timely, and a little too thorough to have been some sort of accident. The Stars PR team certainly knows exactly what it’s doing.

This is a beacon for the NBA-hating, which is a specific kind of hockey fan that turns away from the NBA and runs to the “good Canadian boys” because of the makeup of the NBA. And they’re rarely subtle about it.


They might as well hang a sign outside the American Airlines Center before Stars games that reads, “Give us your ig-nant, your hateful, your chaw-soaked yearning to be racist.”

Or this:

We can't be too careful. Two guys in an airport...talking? It's a little fishy.