Didier Drogba Scores Great Goal Against Scrubbiest Scrubs Imaginable

Technically, this is still a highlight because it’s Didier Drogba scoring an absolute scorcher of a free kick from way far out that probably would’ve flown into the net had he been back in a Chelsea shirt facing like Jordan Pickford or something. However, it’s also kind of a lowlight because it’s Didier Drogba, a veritable soccer icon, suiting up for something called the Phoenix Rising (?) in the USL (???), beating the keeper for the LA Galaxy’s developmental squad (?!?!?!). Yes, it has come to this.

Lest you worry too much for the fate of the once-great Drogba, the Rising (god, that sounds dumb) do have ambition. Joining Drogba on the roster are former EPL stalwart Shaun Wright-Phillips and longtime Mexican national team regular Omar Bravo. Drogba is actually part owner of the club, and wants to buy them into MLS’s Ponzi scheme-like racket here in the nearish future. So it could be worse, I guess. But it’s still not good seeing him slum it like this.

Still, though, nice free kick.