Note to aspiring drug smugglers: If you're smuggling blow through an airport by stuffing it inside golf equipment, it helps to know a little something about golf. And no, a "handicap" does not mean you have a limp.
Customs officials stopped an unemployed Sussex woman at Manchester Airport (that's England, folks) while carrying a bag of golf clubs after getting off a flight from Jamaica. Nothing suspicious there! Naturally, they struck up a conversation about hitting the links and asked her about pedestrian golfing terms like birdies, fairways and handicaps. That didn't go so well for her.
"When Dryer was asked questions about golf, it was clear that she was totally unfamiliar with the game and she had no legitimate reason for travelling with the sports equipment."
An airport source added: "When asked about her handicap, she looked blank and asked them to repeat the question.
"It appeared as if she thought they were asking her if she had a disability."
It seems that $83,000 worth of sweet yay had been stuffed into the hollowed out shafts of her clubs, and the poor woman will be in jail for the next four years. (I guess that part of the story isn't as funny.) Still, it's a good tip for up-and-coming drug dealers out there: Try recruiting your patsies at the PGA Tour events.
Drug mule balls up her golf quiz [The Sun]