Football Page 1412 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The (Potentially Scandalous, Potentially Frivolous) Saints Vicodin Lawsuit
So Sean Payton and another coach are accused of raiding and abusing the team's medicine cabinet. And the security director making the allegations is accused of blackmailing the team. Tricky stuff. This calls for a breakdown....

Brett Favre's Selfishness Has No Offseason
So now Favre says that if he plays again, he'll have to get ankle surgery first. A simple prognosis, yet he manages to shit on both Vikings and Packers fans with it....

Santonio Holmes, Not Pittsburgh's Problem Anymore
Holmes was removed from an airplane in Pittsburgh last night for refusing to turn off his iPod upon landing. It doesn't bode well when your new acquisition doesn't wait until his suspension begins to get in trouble again. [WPXI]...

The NFL's Worst Human Being Works For The Dolphins
It comes out that the exec who asked Dez Bryant if his mother was a prostitute was Miami GM Jeff Ireland. Hey, Parcells wasn't hung up on character as a coach, why should he change in the front office? [Yahoo!]...

Listen In As Chris Cooley Gets Pulled Over While On The Phone With Radio Show
Cooley, while talking with DC's Sports Junkies on WJFK-FM, was pulled over by a cop this morning for going too wide around a corner. Pro athletes: They're just like us! (Only they manage to wriggle out of their moving violations.) [WashPost; audio]...

Tim Tebow Leads The League In Something, For The First And Last Time
The top selling NFL rookie jerseys are Tebow, Ndamukong Suh, Sam Bradford, Eric Berry and Dez Bryant. One of these five will also be the top selling CFL jersey in 10 years. Try to guess which! [Rovell]...

Marginally Talented Yet Newsworthy Players Find A Home In Tennessee
The Titans spent a late draft pick on Myron Rolle, then signed LeGarrette Blount and Stafon Johnson. Forget Hard Knocks; have they done a Real World: Nashville yet? [Titans Online]...

Tim Tebow And The Broncos: A Match Made In Metaphorical Heaven
Tebow, describing either the orgy scene in Caligula or his first meeting with Josh McDaniels: "There was passion. It was just intense, and it was ball, and it was juice. The juice level in that room was high, and it was awesome."...

Big Ben Might Not Be The Most Popular Steeler
ESPN Outside the Lines did a story about Ben Roethlisberger, and it turns out even before the Milledgeville incident, Big Ben was not a popular locker room guy....

So You Will Be Able To See The Giants And Jets After All
"What a bunch of blockheads!" You said it New York Post....

Matt Millen Apologizes For Calling Ron Jaworski A "Polack"
In cased you missed it, yesterday Millen was on-air discussing fried bologna sandwiches with Buffalo native Ron Jaworski and said "ask any Polack from Buffalo how they like them, right Jaws?"...

Lawrence Taylor Doesn't Recall Much From His Draft Day
Which he blames on the 41 beers he says he drank (in fairness, they were Coors Lights). I wonder what he's drunk on in this video?:...

Your NFL Draft Open Thread, Again
The three-day draft appears to be an unqualified success for the NFL's ratings, as there are plenty of intriguing players left that people will tune in to see. Remaining names include Jimmy Clausen, Colt McCoy and Tim Tebow. Wait, what?...

Your NFL Draft Open Thread
The annual convention of Jets replica jerseys known as the NFL Draft will be gaveled to order soon. Please use this space to discuss....

Ben Roethlisberger Suspended Six Games (Unless He Isn't)
NFL PR confirms that Roger Goodell will suspend the Steelers QB for six games, pending "behavioral evaluation" that could reduce/lengthen the suspension before the season starts. The question: Can he literally keep it in his pants until August? [NFL.com]...

Last Night's Winner: Football, As Usual
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. They might have even won NBA or NHL playoff games last night, but who really knows? Let's talk about games that happen five months from now!...

Happy 65th Birthday, Shirtless Steve Spurrier
Right now, Spurrier is snorkeling somewhere down in the Bahamas. Judging from that photo, some lucky tropical fish are admiring his chiseled bare torso....

The Mel Kiper Files
Yoni Brenner is a Shouter & Murmurer for The New Yorker and a screenwriter on Ice Age 3: Dawn Of The Dinosaurs. He gives you this....

Football Players Get Themselves Charged With Weed Cultivation In Solemn Observance Of Today's Date
Four Louisiana at Lafayette football players were arrested this morning and subsequently suspended indefinitely from the team for alleged cultivation of marijuana. Can't we celebrate Jessica Lange's birthday without the law busting in? [The Advertiser]...

Color Me Fucking Shocked: Dick Vitale Loves Tim Tebow
You had to know Vitale would have a chubby for Tebow, the embodiment of heart. It was inevitable. The college basketball sportscaster chimes in today with an unbearable column about why Tebow should be taken high in the draft....