Football Page 1481 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Night's Winner: Pirates Fans
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Pittsburgh's baseball fans, who don't have to be alone anymore. Cheering for championships are overrated anyway!...

Just Because He Tapes His Penis To His Thigh Is No Reason To Judge
"After David Akers nails 55 YD FG in practice, Jon Dorenbos exhalts in celebration, screaming, 'Einhorn's a man!'" [Via]...

I Guess We've Solved All The Real Free Speech Issues
A Central Pennsylvania town is tackling the pernicious threat of Steelers fans. Now the ACLU's getting involved. This is going to be uglier than tonight's game....

Notre Dame Gets Its Angry, Egotistical Man
The South Bend Tribune is reporting that after an earlier feint toward UConn, Notre Dame has made its decision and Cincinnati's Brian Kelly will take the reigns in South Bend. But is he a big enough jerk?...

Last Night's Winner: Mack Brown
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Texas coach Mack Brown, who is about to get seriously paid. This is what is known as "striking while the iron is hot."...

Oakland's Happy Family Just Got A Little More Dysfunctional
Randy Hanson, noted coach punchee, is back working with the Raiders. Even for a historically feckless franchise, this is surprising. Let's look at the possibilities....

A Brief History Of Campus Recruiting Hostesses
We hope you didn't get the impression that Tennessee is the only school to use attractive young ladies as bait to lure prospective athletes, because it's actually a college football tradition as revered as marching bands and beer bongs....

Tennessee's "Hostess" Program Catches Recruits' (And NCAA's) Eyes (Updated)
The New York Times has a verrrrry interesting story about an NCAA investigation at Tennessee, concerning recruiting "hostesses"—i.e., hot Tennessee co-eds who get quite friendly with talented high school football players. (Updates below)...

Guns, Booze, and Saints Fans: A Drama In One Act
Even if this turns out to be a viral video for Smith and Wesson, you kind of know this really happened somewhere in Louisiana, right? [YouTube, thanks Ed!]...

Friendly Texas-Nebraska "Discussion" Leads To Accidental Death
Two Marines got in a "friendly scuffle" while talking about the outcome of Big 12 Championship Game. Unfortunately, one of them forgot to put down his gun and now the other one is dead. [Sun Journal]...

Nerds, Fictional Characters Now Eligible For Heisman
A dude from Standford and someone who plays a made up position called "defensive tackle" are included alongside real football players as Heisman Trophy finalists. Sounds like a classic college prank....worthy of the Hasty Pudding gang! [SJ Mercury News]...

Charlie Weis Isn't Finished With You Yet
You thought Chuckles was out of your life forever, huh? Guess again, bozos, because this guy hasn't even started making everyone's life miserable. Pete Carroll, Touchdown Jesus, Bears fans....no one will escape the wrath of Weis....

NFL.com Gives The Fans A (Stupid, Racist) Voice
Like most websites, NFL.com sets aside space to highlight the wittiest, most intriguing comments from its legion of readers in a special place labeled, "The Crowd Has Spoken." Unfortunately, the crowd is mostly angry, illiterate jacknobs....

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: See How He Loved Football Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

E.J. Henderson's Leg Should Not Bend That Way
In case you missed it, the Vikings' E.J. Henderson took a nasty shot last night....but Al Michaels had no problem breaking out the break talk for the guy with the broken femur. Break. [YouTube, D4L, SSF]...

Texas Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Texas Longhorns, who won the weekend by not having to prove they were better than everyone else. Welcome to college football!...

The BCS Tries To Manufacture A Little Drama (UPDATE)
We're about an hour away from the BCS selection show. Is there any chance the national title game will feature anyone other than Alabama or Texas?...

The SEC Title Game, In Microcosm
This video in no way proves that women are better than men at sports. It only proves that Alabama students are better than Florida students at sports. [Via YBB]...

A Turdfest On Paper Gives Us A Few Gems
Ten early games, and only one features two teams with winning records. Rex Grossman, Matt Moore, Brodie Croyle, Daunte Culpepper and Chris Redman all took snaps today. But what's this about upsets?...

Your Late Games Open Thread
Mike Vick was soundly booed every time he touched the ball, until his two TDs heralded "We Want Vick" chants. Probably led by these two ladies! Discuss the beginning of Tony Romo's annual December meltdown in the comments. [AJC]...