Football Page 1520 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ravens Slingshot Back Into AFC Playoff Picture
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap Oh, eventually you will stop, Brian Westbrook, yes you will. Baltimore's Althea Barnes makes the play, although where Westbrook's forward progress is marked is anyone's guess. Kind...

Manning at Marmalard: Who You Got?
The Colts and the Chargers face off tonight at Qualcomm Stadium in a battle between two goofy looking quarterbacks. You can be sure that Peyton is trying to forget his crappy performances to start the season and the fact that the Chargers knocked the Colts out of last year's playoffs. Rivers is curr...

The Jets Fly High Over the Titans
After 12 weeks the Tennessee Titans have joined the ranks of the defeated thanks to (sigh) Brett Favre and the New York Jets. Apparently there's been a rather large puddle of blood on the field stemming from an injury to Albert Haynesworth, and from what I understand there have been no efforts made...

Donovan Is Chilly Yet Stylish
Thanks to Christmas Ape for this screengrab of Donovan McNabb strutting his stuff on the sideline in his favorite oversized mittens. So far they don't seem to be working because the Eagles haven't been able to get it downfield, and the quarterback has thrown an interception. Philly and Baltimore ar...

The Jets Try To Steal Perfection From The Titans
Could today be the end of perfection for the Titans? Tennessee faces off against Favre and the Jets at 1:00 and it should be a doozy. Even with Favre's probable interceptions, the Jets should prove to be the Titans biggest challenge so far. For once I'll be rooting for the Jets, as perfection is bor...

Hugh Johnson Feels Right At Home In Beaver Stadium
Penn State needs to secure a home win this afternoon against Michigan State, and through one and a half quarters things couldn't be going much better. The Nittany Lions have built up a 14-0 lead over the Spartan. Penn State is getting great performances out of quarterback Daryll Clark,who has throw...

Hugh Is Impressed With What He Sees From the 'Eers
West Virginia, led by the fleet-footed Pat White, is having a field day on the ground in Louisville. Energized by a goaline stand to end the half the Mountaineers opened things up and have now compiled well over three hundred yards on the ground. White is leading the way with 199 yards and three to...

Joey Porter Refuses To Stop Talking
Everyone's favorite batshit crazy linebacker, Joey Porter, has graced us with some words of wisdom yet again. In an interview with the South Florida Sun Sentinel, Porter pleads his case on behalf of Michael Vick and pit bulls. When asked if Vick should get a second chance, Porter replied: ...

Jets QB Not Named Favre Suspended For Violating Drug Policy
It is not a good week for back-up quarterbacks. First it was Florida, now the Jets. It seems that Jets Rookie QB Erik Ainge was suspended four games by the NFL on Friday for violating the league’s policy on steroids and related substances. It doesn't seem to be a huge loss for the team: ...

What Is There To Do In State College, Pennsylvania?
Tomorrow morning, I will wake up at an unholy hour to drive to Penn State University for the foot-ball contest between the nation's two premiere land grant colleges. (Look it up.) It will be my first trip ever to Happy Valley and Beaver Stadium and part of my journey will be to figure out why there ...

Seattle Sports Are Pretty Depressing Right Now
"Lorin “Big Lo” Sandretzky has gone through more than most. A former strip-club bouncer, he has been beaten and stabbed and watched three people die in his arms. He nearly died himself on three occasions during an emergency operation and won the lottery. In the last year, he had two additional emerg...

College Football Preview: I've Got a Crush on Mike Leach
I've got a crush on Mike Leach. I don't want to go on a date and eat cheese fries with him and watch planes take off from Lubbock or anything but I'm not going to pretend I don't like him anymore. We aren't in 8th grade. So I'm coming clean. My football team, the Tennessee Vols, has never had a coa...

The MAAC: Where College Football Programs Go To Die
Astute college gridiron fans fans may be saying to themselves right now, "But the MAAC doesn't even exist anymore!" You're right! The Metro Atlantic Athletic Conference still fields 10 Division I basketball team, but the Division I-AA (I refuse to write it) football arm disbanded after last season. ...

Fashion Choices Of The Damned, Brady Quinn's Pinky, And Cowher To The Browns?
• An Eagles Shirt? What? So Dieon Sanders interviewed Terrell Owens recently, and the conversation was shown during Thursday's halftime of the Steelers-Bengals game. Main question: Why is T.O. wearing an Eagles shirt? It's possible that Deion's incisive reporting skills ferreted out the answer, but ...

Richie Incognito Prefers Angry Boos To Quiet Indifference
Things are tough all over in St. Louis, what with the Rams playing out the string on a 2-8 season with the sinking realization that Jim Haslett is who we thought he was. Perhaps the only thing that could make it better is to have a nice public feud between players and fans over who is worse at their...

The Audacity Of Hope
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap With the economy in a tailspin and Congress ignoring the auto industry's bailout pleas, it seems only fitting that this is the year that the Lions make their most serious push towar...

Thursday Night Preview: #23 Miami at Georgia Tech
These Thursday night ACC Football previews are starting to have a Groundhog Day quality about them. (Insert team here) controls their own destiny unless they lose in which case the same scenerio repeats itself again, and again, and again. Shoot me now. This is why we need a college football tsar (o...

Former Viking Would Very Much Like To Hit Brad Childress In The Head
Current Jaguars wideout Troy Williamson spent his first three seasons in the NFL angering Minnesota fans with his mediocre play and current Vikings coach Brad Childress spent his first two years angering Minnesota fans by putting him into games. Of course, all of this happened during the downtime wh...

Dim-Witted Donovan McNabb Sick Of Talking About Dim-Wittedness
Obviously, I'm not happy about how things in Iggle-ville right now, but given my state of euphoria after a Phillies championship it's tough to get too angry about the dumbfounding dipshittery that has crippled this football team this year. Granted, the recent revelations about Donovan McNabb's compl...

The Return Of Pacman, Ocho Bencho, And 'At The Movies' With Tony Romo And A Homeless Guy
• Wait, Is That Pacman Jones' Entrance Music? Adam Pacman Jones is back — a fact which absolutely thrills this particular writer: "The NFL's poster child for foolish behavior is returning to the Cowboys. That's right, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has reinstated Pacman Jones, giving him yet another...